What do I do with this PCIE?

Nope

If it was that simple, consoles would be dead already, since even casual ppl could do this.

well there sort of is a plug&play graphic card thing for laptops but it doesn't use the PCIE slot from the laptop and I think it's only for alienware atm but if this becomes a thing it will likely be adopted by many laptops. http://www.pcworld.com/article/2839436/the-alienware-graphics-amplifier-lets-you-add-a-desktop-video-card-to-a-laptop.html

That's an express USB port NOT PCI-E.

You could try something like this. Also, the DIY version.
I suspect the power needed by the card you pick might be a factor, so double check th requirements. Maybe a GTX750 would be a "safe" pick.
Triple check. :)

First of all, it's not a graphics card. It's the built in GPU chip that comes with your i5 CPU. Second of all, you might want to read up on what that port ACTUALLY is before asking such stupid questions. It's not wrong to ask things, but when stuff can be avoided by simply opening your eyes you can save yourself lots of time. And you also avoid embarrassing yourself.

Rearrange the letters and make it EPIC.

no that hole is for a external card like this