Update on status of surgery:

Aug 15- Note: Closing this thread as real life is taking over... thank you all for your awesome support!

This event is where you might find me on SG...

August 14th appointment with each brain doctor and surgeon, MRI of brain, etc... a stressful day
-- the day was stressful but went well... met my surgeon who is a great guy!

Enough about me:
August 14th
My wife's mother (my mother in law) went thru surgery today to remove cancerous tumors... She just found out she had cancer 2 weeks ago... so this year has been rough as many of you remember I just lost my mother because of thyroid cancer... now my wife's mother has cancer...Today we received the news that the cancer had spread more than realized... we will know more details as lab tests come back from biopsies taken...

August 29th: Surgery on my brain to implant electrical diodes (one on each side of brain)
Sept 11: Surgery to implant mechanical controller in chest and wiring
?: Appointment to turn on electrical brain implants
?: Appointment to tweak the settings of mechanical controller


The "Small Celebrations" thread has grown into a beautiful common ground for our SG community to celebrate family, friendship, and that of sharing small joys in daily life that really end up being rather LARGE in importance.

However, there are things we all face which make celebrating and holding onto the positive joys in life rather difficult... such as the loss of a dear loved one in death, or chronic physical health issues. We must make an extra special effort during such times to "stop and take time to smell the roses." Especially at these times we need others to provide support and encouragement and that we likewise can give support and encouragement.

In Small Celebrations Thread V 1.0 the SG community came together for four months to provide love, care and support to me because of my Mother's struggle with cancer and her death on April 24, 2017. Thank you, everyone, for all the kind, warm words given to me during that time of need, the GA contributions, and the sharing of small celebrations within your own life also.

I felt that it was time to unveil V 2.0 of this thread and introduce another piece to the puzzle of how much I value small celebrations and why. Like the lyme awareness thread-- this thread can also become an awareness thread for a chronic condition I'm daily struggling with presently.

At age 40 I started having tremors in my right hand that steadily increased for a few months that also appeared in my right foot. After 10 months of doctor after doctor with several thinking it was just anxiety and all in my head-- it became clear that I was IN FACT struggling with something VERY real. I was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease on April 1st, 2008... and it was far from being an April's fools joke from my doctor.

I was a sign language interpreter and Gold's Gym spin instructor (indoor bike). I lost control of my right arm, pain and rigidity took over the right side of my body and in just 2 years I was taken out of both jobs unable to function in either and qualified for permanent disability. Parkinson's affects people differently. For me it is painful, intense tremors (right side and now full body), loss of balance, difficulty walking, and very tight and rigid muscles. Another issue is with bradykinesia which is a quick appearance of slowness, inability to move or function in daily activities... I also have uncontrollable trembling and sweating during that time. Thus I stay at home and in bed suffering about 75-80% of my day time.

Because of the serious increase in symptoms, I am going through a series of tests to receive a brain surgery called DBS- Deep Brain Stimulation. This is a device implanted in the brain that sends electrical charges to a specific area 24/7 to reduce symptoms. A wire is also implanted under the skin, down the neck and into a pacemaker-like controller within the chest.

The surgery will be in 4 months from now and you have to be awake during it and off of all drugs. That makes it rather a daunting ordeal especially since it requires me to have been off all Parkinson's medications for over 24 hrs so they can see when they poke the right place and my symptoms subside. I don't see how this will be possible as my body without any medicine help is in a constant spasmodic writhing and painful rigid trembling. Of course, I will be very nervous during this first part of the procedure that will take a non-stop 10 hours.

I have now almost 10 years of experience with Parkinson's (In a few months I'll be 50.) I have 3 children, all boys ages 5, 8 and 10. Of course it is difficult to even do simple things but small celebrations are playing with them, and words of affection showered on them daily.

If any of you have similar neurological conditions and would like to share your story or ask questions-- I'm available here as is everyone else on SG within this thread. I've been through A LOT including many side effects of medications-- voices, hallucinations, paranoia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, grandiose thinking, etc... and I'm willing to be an open support to any as I've received SO MUCH caring support myself.


Some examples of small celebrations:

-My son made the A-honor roll.
-I hugged my wife today and told her I love her.
-My baby took his first step!
-I passed my driver's test!
-I played ball with my children today!

We all daily have small celebrations that we can celebrate if we stop and take time to notice them. These "small" things are actually rather big on retrospection.

I appreciate so much support from everyone in this thread. We all share in common the sufferings of disease, sickness, pain and death of our dear loved ones and thus can find comfort and strength from each other to endure this... We must cherish the moments daily with those we love because those "small" things end up being the BIGGEST thing of all.

SG id name Small Celebration GA Level
jeffhowe celebrating the love for my wife Barrier X Level 2
LosTSouLVL Le'olam al tevatri, never give up!!! ❤️ 😎 Heart&Slash Level 3, SGTools
igel2005 having a week long vacation Puzzle Agent Level 1, SGTools

FORMAT:

myidname | my small celebration explanation here | [Name of the GA](link to the GA here) | Level#here

**Note: Info on hospice care from SG user genkicoll here

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6 years ago*

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Please choose what you are struggling with now which noticing and recognizing small celebrations can help provide support...

View Results
Personal Chronic Physical Health Condition
Personal Emotional Condition or Depression
Personal Mental Disorder
Loss of close family or friend in Death
Close family or friend with Chronic Physical Health Condition
Close family or friend with Emotional Condition or Depression
Close family or friend with Mental Disorder
No sufferings of myself or close family and friends for now...

Reserved

Ended:
hotshot21 | I spent the day with the woman I love! | Bone Complete Bundle (Small train) | Level 1
jeffhowe | Celebrating the success of the puzzle event I designed! | DRAGON: A Game About a Dragon 3 copies | Level 2
Diddles92 | New job close to home | A Boy and His Blob | Level 0
cheshirecatgirl | Heatwave finally broke with rain | FIVE: Guardians of David | Level 3
BabyCorgi | Nieces visiting August after 2 years | Sunrider: Liberation Day - Captain's Edition | Level 3 (sgtools)
JenniferVanessa | Birthday and started hrt | Transocean | Level 0
Waxlor | For getting in touch again with an old SG friend | Blackbay Asylum | Level 1+
Akylen | Relatives with mental disorders | 7 Grand Steps: What Ancients Begat | Level 0 (sgtools)
cheshirecatgirl |Enjoying a small (3day) holiday break | Dead in Bermuda | level 2
cbones | blacklist forgiveness (run for more than a week so ANYONE can join) | Ashes of the Singularity: Escalation, Maize | Level 0+
Nask0 | Going to my hometown for the weekend for my cousin's wedding. Life is good | Else Heart.Break() | Level 0 sgtools
AnnuDazz | Ramadan Month | Hound, Ultimate Solid, Construct: Escape the System | Lvl 1 (no SG tool)
LosTSouLVL | Out of solidarity with Jeff. ❤️ | Arcana Heart 3 LOVE MAX!!!!! |.Level 3, SGTools
jeffhowe | In honor of the deep love for Khazadson's Uncle Charles who was a great man | Road to Balhalla | 2
CallMeKap | Struck while cycling by a hit and run driver, but I'm going to be ok | They Bleed Pixels | Level 1
jeff Howe | celebrating the many strong people in my life that conquered despite adversity!! They are my role models! | 10 Wagon Inspirational Train | Level 3+
Fyantastic | Read the short story in my GA description :) | DARK SOULS™ II: Scholar of the First Sin | Level 1
Shadders | For all those people who give of their time to help others. |ABZU| 0
Waxlor | Grateful for positivity as shown in this thread | Kimmy | Lvl 2
JenniferVanessa | Friend reached out and wanted me. | Visitors | Level 0
cheshirecatgirl | Space Cat likes me | Steamworld Heist | level 2, SGtools
kalimha | celebrate the existence of this great community | Elizabeth Find M.D. - Diagnosis Mystery | Level 2
AnnuDazz | i'm just so happy today ^_^ | Cook, Serve, Delicious! | Level 1 (no SG tool
Xiangming | Got parts for a new computer build | Obulis Alien Breed Trilogy.Etherlords 1&2 | 2
Xiangming | Spring is here, and Summer is coming! I'll be free from the darkness for the whole time!! | Garshasp: Monster Slayer Garshasp: Temple Of The Dragon Sacra boar | 2
Xiangming | My computer chair broke! This may not seem positive, but it wasn't a decent chair and I've found a gently used Steelcase Leap for ~$200 (retail $1,000-$1,500) | Eschalon Book 2 Bit Dungeon II | 2
(https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/qje2f/danmaku-unlimited-2) | Level 2
cbones | A past quiet Saturday night | GoNNER - Press Jump To Die Edition | Level 3+
cbones | A current quiet Saturday night | Super Rude Bear Resurrection | Level 3+
cbones | A future quiet Saturday night | Metrico+ | Level 3+
Caractacus | For family, past and present | Bang Bang Bang | 2
Nask0 | For the love and dedication between son and mother! ❤️ | Evoland 2 | Level 2, SGT
Corran | For all those that should never be forgotten:| Monster Loves You | 1
LosTSouLVL | For the love and dedication between son and mother! ❤️ | BlazBlue: Chronophantasma Extend | Level 3, SGTools
Dragomania | Happy Easter ! | Zombie Vikings | 3 , sgtools
Dragomania | Happy Easter ! | The Flame in the Flood | 3 , sgtools
LosTSouLVL | Have a Happy Easter\Happy Passover! :3 | GoNNER | Level 3, SGTools
Pabl0z | Birth of a friend's child | Duke Grabowski, Mighty Swashbuckler | lvl3 sgtools
Irdra | Family Forever | Akihabara - Feel the Rhythm | 5
Wintermule75 | the love of my Mom and brother is unending | Journal |.Level 3

6 years ago*
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AnnuDazz | i'm just so happy today ^_^ | Cook, Serve, Delicious! | Level 1 (no SG tool)

6 years ago*
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cbones | blacklist forgiveness (run for more than a week so ANYONE can join) | [Ashes of the Singularity: Escalation](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/rV78B/ashes-of-the-singularity-escalation), [Maize](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/zYpqZ/maize) | Level 0+

6 years ago
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cbones | a beautiful weekend | [Galactic Civilizations III](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/BjTQ0/galactic-civilizations-iii) | Level 0+

6 years ago
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Thanks! Added!

6 years ago
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this GA has ended

6 years ago
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Thanks... updated!

6 years ago
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bump

6 years ago
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6 years ago
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Thanks for sharing your story, and best of luck for getting the surgery. It does sound extremely scary but if it can improve your quality of life and the things you're able to do with your kids, it's most likely worth it.

And thanks for relaunching this thread/keeping it alive, it's such a positive thread <3

6 years ago
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Thank you so much EBS... Yes, the surgery is so necessary. There are some issues that I may need to iron out beforehand as the neuro-psychologist thinks I need psycho-therapy before I go under the drills and scalpels.

6 years ago
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In any case, the psychotherapy can only help you (in the worst case you don't click with the therapist and you can always find another), so there's no harm into it. I really wish you the best and I hope you'll keep us updated on the whole process as long as it's not too personal for you to share, which I would understand.

6 years ago
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Thank you Jeff for rebooting your thread and for sharing your very personal story. Having had cancer myself I feel very humbled by your story and I wish you and you're family all the best prior, during and after the surgery.

6 years ago
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I read Superfabs lyme thread and thought I'd come "out of the closet."

I think asking SG community for support before and during my brain surgery will make the best come out of everyone... ;)

6 years ago
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I understand, it took me a while to talk openly having cancer and in the beginning I only talked about it in private steam messages and closed groups like BAA.

6 years ago
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Yea last year first part of the year I hid my condition behind a huge puzzle event where only a few solvers discovered my condition as you would have to solve much to get to that information.

I think that being more open about it helps not just me but everyone else too. We need more opportunities to see the best come out of this community...

6 years ago
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The procedure sounds really tough, I hope they can give you some training so that way you can prepare. Best wishes for your surgery.

6 years ago
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Thank you SSPssp... Yes, I will need to get some training on how to stay calm and less anxiety during the surgery. I'm hoping they might even let my family members take turns coming in and holding my hand etc and being a support during the surgery.

6 years ago
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Yes, that would be great if your family could come! :)

6 years ago
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Oh. Well. What can I say.
First of all thanks for your availability to share your knowledge and for you be ready to listen and help other people.
I have never experienced in first person something like that you are describing.
I can only imagine how much will and perseverance one must have to go through a condition like yours.
My best wishes for your surgery, jeff. I am sure all SG supports and cheers you.

6 years ago
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Thank you for your warm words!

Added a 10 GA event above in chart!

6 years ago
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You're welcome, jeff. I lost my father to cancer. At least I know what it means to go through this specific pain.

Let me contribute my small gift to this wonderful thread:
https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/2cLEP/journal

6 years ago
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Thanks so much... to post here a GA you must also say something you are celebrating....

Can be something specific in your life that happened today or recently or a general theme such as "love and support from friends"

Or "celebrating the support found in this thread" etc...

What would you like to say?

6 years ago
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Oh, yeah, you are right.
Well, I would like to celebrate the love of my mother and my brother: it's truly unending!

6 years ago
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Updated and added your GA to chart!

Thanks!

6 years ago
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I am so, so sorry, that you have to endure all of this and honestly, I'm sure I coudn't do it.
I can't even imagine how it must feel to not be able to controll your own body propberly, when it just... doesn't work the way it's intended. Reading your story... makes me incredibly sad and grateful at the same time. Sad, because it's not fair that anyone has to suffer so much and... well, grateful, because my own problems seem so small compared to this.

I hope, from the bottom of my heart, that your surgery goes well and that you can tell us the wonderful story of your recovery. I really want to hear it ^^

6 years ago
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You guessed it right... initially I was so bothered by my tremor as I wasn't consciously moving my arm like that but it was moving on it's own..l it was extremely unsettling. But now it's just a part of life.

Thanks for your wishes for a successful surgery.

6 years ago
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Wow... I also live with some chronic issues and sometimes I feel completely overwhelmed, but I can't even start to imagine what you must have gone through. I hope everything goes well and they find a solution to improve your condition as much as possible. Best wishes.

6 years ago
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You can have a first person understanding of suffering and have it make you more empathetic towards others who are suffering with chronic illnesses.

When you start to feel overwhelmed then take a moment to breathe and notice something to help feel joy... and come visit the thread and give and receive support. We can't do this alone.

6 years ago
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People here with actual problems make mine seem even more underwhelming and stupid. I've heard about dbs, it's honeslty awesome, good luck with that.

A friend reached out to me to come visit this week, it's so nice to feel wanted. Will make ga when I get home.

[JenniferVanessa](www.steamgifts.com/user/jennifervanessa/) | Friend reached out and wanted me. | [Visitors](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/InShS/visitors) | Level 0

6 years ago*
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Depression and emotional concerns are just as valid of real issues that make ones suffer greatly and require support from others...

Thanks for your support here on the thread!

6 years ago
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Still mine shouldn't be as debilitating as mine are, It's me that's the problem not my problems, I'm jusst a victim.

Also ga is added now.

6 years ago
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Emotional issues are sometimes even more debilitating than physical health issues.

You aren't the problem... ones brain chemistry, hormones, trauma and stress from outside influences or childhood can play into it....

To get out of the cycle and break free from depression and negative disabling emotions, we must not think we are the problem... this destroys self esteem and keeps us from constructive healing.

6 years ago
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Bump-- added a 10 GA celebratory event!

6 years ago*
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hope your surgery will go ok :)
still a lot of great things will happen in that time, enjoy it!

6 years ago
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Thank you! I will find the things to enjoy and cherish that! ;)

6 years ago
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Oh wow, I never knew. :(
I don't have much to say at this moment, but I really hope your surgery goes well (though it does NOT sound fun).

6 years ago
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Thanks Mari1 for your warm wishes on my surgery.

6 years ago
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I'm not easily shaken by health issues (had a partial facioplegia in my youth, with the risk of losing sight in one eye, and was very relaxed about it all the time) but a brain surgery awake ... no idea how I'd want to manage that. Best of luck!

6 years ago
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This video is amazing about the surgery but don't think placebo effect will do anything for me.,,

6 years ago
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I'm in awe for the courage you have shown us.
All thru the v1.0 of the thread and now you are being so positive and I beleive this can only help you in your battle and coupled with the love and support from your family and friends you will prevail!
You are in my prayers, my friend <3
Be strong, Jeff!

6 years ago
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Wow powerful statements!

With such friends as you behind me it's courage compounded from your courage...

That's exactly what enCOURAGEment is!

6 years ago
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In a couple of weeks my mother will have been gone 1 year. I'm still sad that my youngest won't remember her.

Positive note tho is that I have made a memory book for each of the grandkids to help remember her. Also later this month on the anniversary of her death we are using some of her ashes to plant trees so we will always have a part her with us.

That ended up longer than I planned lol.

Irdra | Family Forever | [Akihabara - Feel the Rhythm] (https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/RSvBw/akihabara-feel-the-rhythm) | 5

6 years ago
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Love the memory book idea! Simply beautiful!

I'll have my 3 boys help make memory books of their own.

We made a family garden on my sisters property where we put my fathers ashes and now will put Moms. All of us kids and our families will likewise be put there as time goes on. She and her husband own a large amount of land with ponds etc... and it's in a beautiful secluded area and landscaped beautifully by my sister and her husband who does landscaping for a living!

6 years ago
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With all you are going thru, I was thinking with myself, how positive you are. I'm a lawyer and I met lots of sick clients with all sort of diseases. They came to me to help them to reach their "retirement" for permanent disability (government benefit that is always denied in very short lines). Most of them became bitter and most ot the times they feel cursed, like life keeps pushing them to quit everything... and I can say that almost them all feel way different than you feel right now.
These threads are a small example of how strong you guys are. This is what I see after all these years and all these people I've met so far. I see a pattern in people like some here: whatever problem happens, you guys are already ready to fight. I don't have myself any problems of this magnitude, so I can't tell how I'll react to these problems, but I can proudly say that you guys are an awesome fighters. Keep going that way, really.

6 years ago
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Thanks for your words! I think I take after my Dad... I never heard him complain, be bitter, or speak negative his whole life... even when he suffered with COPD towards the end. Growing up I never heard him complain about absolutely anything even when tired, in pain, cold, hot, hungry, etc.... and thus I'm just like that myself. Complaining and being negative because of difficulties is completely foreign to me.

That nature has worked well for me and helped me and others in so many ways.

I could do better at fighting though. I don't exercise like I should.. my anxiety level is high, and self esteem very low.

I didn't have any issue getting disability benefits started quickly as it was clear that I was disabled... the condition at onset emerged rather noticeable and intense.

Thanks soooo much for your words and seeing the good in many on this board. I see many here that are strong and positive as you explained also... and it makes me have a warm smile.

6 years ago
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My condolences on your loss, Jeff. :(

{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}

6 years ago
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6 years ago
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Thank you for posting that.:)

added you to my Whitelist for being a really nice person

6 years ago
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Sorry to hear about your mother passing, even if it was expected. At least she had her family supporting her until the end.
And, damn.. Parkinson's? I'm just at a loss for words.. All I can say is stay strong and don't lose your positivity!
All the best to you and good luck with the surgery!

Edit:
I made a giveaway for Duke Grabowski, Mighty Swashbuckler: lvl3 sgtools
I don't often find many (even small) things to celebrate, but one of my best friends' first child was born a couple of days ago.
I think that's worth some celebration :)

Edit2:
Pabl0z | Birth of a friend's child | Duke Grabowski, Mighty Swashbuckler | lvl3 sgtools

6 years ago*
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Thanks so much for your kind words... and GA contribution.

About the surgery... I'll make sure my surgeon has read the book pictured here...

View attached image.
6 years ago
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oh wow, tell me that book is real!

6 years ago
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thump!

6 years ago
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Just wanted to say good luck with your surgery. I hope everything will go well. I'm sorry to hear about your mom but I'm glad to hear that you posted she was able to go peacefully. We all can only ask for a peaceful way to go out. People like you and threads like these that promote awareness for others and continue to show that you can still try to live your life even with a very very difficult condition is what we need more in this world. Thank you for sharing and continue to enjoy life little celebrations that comes to us all :). Stay happy everyone.

6 years ago
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Thank you for your words of encouragement!

Especially your appreciation for this thread. It has allowed the best of our SG community to shine. I have faith in people and it surely has shined through.

Everyone is great on this thread! What a testimony to the true human spirit and that of community.

6 years ago
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I agree. So many selfless and generous people on steamgifts. I'm glad for such a great community.

6 years ago
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bump!

6 years ago
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Bump

6 years ago
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Good luck with the surgery! A surgery on the own brain is something I couldn't take that easily - it's great to see someone staying that positive when facing such an operation.

6 years ago
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I have a close friend that has epilepsy and had brain surgery where they took a part of her brain out the size of a deck of cards... and it was especially successful. She is my inspiration.

6 years ago
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Bump
Good luck and stay positive!

6 years ago
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Thanks so much gegeru!

6 years ago
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Best of luck with your surgery. I have seen documentaries on that particular surgery..with wonderfull results.

6 years ago
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Bump and good luck!

6 years ago
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Closed 6 years ago by jeffhowe.