How much do you believe in friendship?
Watched the LOTR trilogy 2 months ago, so this is fresh in my mind. :D
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Maybe my standards for friendship are way too high, or maybe the people are just shit, but in a friendship, I go for quality over quantity, in a kind of "all or nothing" way. So far it's been mostly "nothing". I've realized it's easier to not expect anything.
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I think you got the right of it, going for quality over quantity. But your state of mind when entering a relationship with any person also has a way of affecting it. If you set yourself up for disappointment, you'll undoubtedly end up being disappointed.
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I have a lot of acquaintances and a few good friends. Really good friends. I believe in friendship. I am lucky I have friends in almost all continents, Americas, Asia, Africa, Europe and Australia, I miss only Antarctica. Not virtual friends, real people that I have met at some point in my life. A true friend is recognized in the darkest times, when you're surrounded by problems, apart from the problems around you there will be only true friends. In moments of fun everyone seems to be a friend and often they are only false friends.
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A friend is someone you can wake up in the middle of their sleep, and they'll come right over, no matter what.
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Since I don't want to bump your previous thread, I'll talk about both here...
If I found an anonymous, untraceable lottery ticket of 100000000000$ would make me really happy, not because I want anything for myself, but I imagine all the good things that could be done with the money.
I not only believe in friendship, but I am a slave to it. I'm like a soulbound item. Once I become friends with someone, I'll be attached to them for a looooong time(until friendship is deleted)
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I seem to be exceptionally bad at making friends. The last friend I trusted really hurt me and betrayed my trust after many years of friendship. Batshit crazy stuff. It was very bad, it was a few years ago and it still really upsets me to think about it. I have a couple of people I talk to online, and a couple of people I keep in touch with from school, but that's it. I'd actually really like to have more friends, but people are crazy and I don't want to get hurt like that again. Of course, I have my husband for company and he's my best friend too so don't feel too lonely.
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Oh gosh, that sounds terrible. I feel sorry for you. May you find many actual good friends in the future! :)
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Thing is, friendship is never meant to last. Remember the saying? Your best friend can become your worst enemy? As time passes, people notice the flaws, and circumstances can and will strain bonds, compounding into a big fallout. So I don't really bother with seeking out friends. I'm sure however some people are ready to look past the flaws and accept people, no matter their personality.
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Never had more than 1 friend at a time, and even then not too close. Never talk about personal things or anything less than superficial shared interests.
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Yep, some friends can turn out to be no more than people who find it useful to keep you close.
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Human beings are social creatures.
People toss around the word "friend" quite liberally. You may only learn if someone is truly your friend when they have the opportunity to be there for you when you need them with no benefit to (or even a sacrifice for) themselves and they come through.
But a bad experience is no reason to go through life pretending you don't need bonds with others. There's no reason for anyone to not believe in friendship except as a defense mechanism for their own prior painful experiences and fears, or their clinical detachment from others.
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I'm 0/1 person, either I'm giving everything for something or nothing at all. That's why I'm expecting from people to either be serious and really care or don't care at all. I don't tolerate in between states like "It's funny to talk with you and hang out with you, but I'm not gonna help you if you need help and I will talk about you behind your back".
So I have never had true friend. Just people I'm talking with, but they are gone when I need help. It was always like this - I met someone with whom I can talk freely, it looks like we're getting along nicely but at the end they fuck me up in some way. Either by leaving me without a word or behaving shitty towards me to the point I had been deciding there's not use in trying to get along with them.
Right now there is one person who comes back sometimes after few month of no contact to say "Why aren't you saying anything! But whatever, I just find new something". She talks about it and leave for few months. And another one which is more or less ok, but in the end when I have problems it's always "I don't know what to tell, I don't want to think about it / you're just lazy and depression is useful excuse / don't complaining, I'm having it worse". So meh. I don't believe in friendship and I think I won't believe in the future.
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Self-fulfilling prophecy.
If you're looking for faults and negative things you'll find them. And eventually overlook the good things.
And if you believe no-one is worthy of your friendship maybe you're the problem?
This just generally speaking, not you specifically gag6357
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I'm not talking about just making friends. I'm talking about BOTHERING to make friends. I have no grand standards for the same, nor do I expect others to meet them. This is the real world after all. However, I would much rather leave it to the others to decide if I'm worth keeping as a friend, instead of me.
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People are not perfect, but some qualities that we all possess (in greater or lesser amounts) are perfect. Surround yourself with the best people you can find, and they will help you to be the best person you can be. As for relationships (of whatever kind), it is up to the individual to decide if a particular relationship is worth the effort of nurturing it.
If you ever need a "reality check," you know where to find me.
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Being Casual #1 Being Casual #3
I'll be honest. The years have changed me too much, not just in appearance (I look like a stick now), but in my outlook towards.... inconveniences. But not in the way you would think. I had always been introverted from the beginning, but only in socializing. Took me 9 years of school to get out of my shell and actually make a friend for once, after which I went through the motions, aka. overusing Facebook, messaging, going to meet friends in the weekends, hanging out too much, obsessing too much over birthday parties etc. You know how kids function, don't you?
However, an event 2 years later..... broke me badly, to the point where all notions of friendship were thrown out of the window, and replaced with utter bitterness towards the very concept. I hated having any sort of need to keep friends around me at all times. I hated counting on them, because they would inevitably let me down. And above all else, I saw them as a liability, clouding my judgement, influencing my thought process, and making me not be me. To this day, I do not bother with calling anyone "friends". I am chivalrious, helpful to all who ask for help, never rude to anyone who isn't rude to me, BUT, never attached (Most of my classmates and acquiantances on Steam can vouch for this).
So. Do you actually believe in the "power of friendship"? And if you do not, do you think
myour way is right?No, I wasn't ditched by a girlfriend, in case you were wondering.
And all of those who know me, please don't noogie me for this.
Else
I would be forced,
to ask SadisticChicken for help to stab all of you.
Ok fine, you want your gibs? Take em.
Now go be useful. There is nothing else left this time. I mean it.
No seriously, I can't keep giving away full priced games every day. Stahp lookin'.
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