Deleted

"would you like to sign my petition" postal guy ...

My mother often says: "Life is like a chicken ladder. Short and full of shit."

View attached image.

"You know, it may well be that you are an ordinary vegetable, and a long time ago you were devoured by some herbivorous monster, whose gastric juice is capable of causing completely plausible hallucinations in the digested food, so you just enjoy the crushing illusion of your wonderful interesting life, for last" ~Max Frei

"Silence is worse; all truths that are kept silent become poisonous." - Friedrich Nietzsche.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

I don't know (and don't care tbh) who exactly said that. I heard this from the boss in Furi

Who nothing have,nothing lose.

"Shoot - first. Think - never." - Ashley J. Williams

"Yikes Forever" - Misfortune Ramirez Hernandez

“Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time”

The universe is a cruel, uncaring void. The key to being happy isn't a search for meaning. It's to just keep yourself busy with unimportant nonsense, and eventually, you'll be dead.

― Mr. Peanutbutter (bojack horseman)

"Whatever happens, happens" - Spike Spiegel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCnbiPbUtxo

Do not KILL - Do not RAPE - Do not STEAL
these are the principles, that every man of every faith can embrace.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oA9Owazv_uU

I'm a practical guy and I like straight forward quotes - "If you fall, you have to get back up, dust yourself off and try again - you can't give up!"
Said in Nitro Circus after they crash a car and are brought to hospital

But definitely can be applied to everything

"I like quotes, but aphorisms sounds weird." - RenegadeMeister

So you should've had a potato option in your poll for me to vote on 😉

EDIT: Quoted myself

“I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel.”

― Terry Pratchett

I have way too many but this one seems apt:

"She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit."
     -- W. Somerset Maugham

One more cause I really like it:

"If you will make a man happy, add not to his riches, but take away from his desires."
     -- Epicurus

In order to do something you've never done, you've got to become someone you've never been.

I love this.

off the top of my head https://youtu.be/PA7t62JvlA8?t=26

"Understanding is a three-edged sword. Your side, their side, and the truth."

-J. Michael Straczynski

“All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day.”

The Joker. (aka Alan Moore - Batman: The Killing Joke)

I want to be a human being, not a human doing.