Well, you can call the police, to begin with. If you get to a divorce she basically gave up with her rights with this behaviour, so you should get to keep your children's custody.
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If they weren't divorced or divorcing they probably still share full custody meaning that it's not kidnapping but there's still a lot that the law can do to help (it would likely involve a lot of lawsuits vs criminal charges).
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My last week is bad too. I can not study what I like for the second consecutive year, my depressive problems are getting worse because of the bad news recivo lately, my friends pass me completely, I am chronically ill, all my friends have a girlfriend / boyfriend and see them happy makes me feel even more depressed. I've been depressed about 9 years and things have not gotten better ever. I understand how you may feel. Don't give up man! :)
Also, try call the police adn say shes missing, if they find her try talk with.
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She can't just take the kids like that, there are plenty of ways you can answer to that, use them. And don't be nice with her, not with what she's done, that's horrible :/ I hope all of this will get better for you, health and "wife".
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Thanks for the kind words, guys, it does mean a lot to me. I expected to get flamed, so it's nice of you all to not make this worse for me
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Man, let me give you a hearty pat on the back and say "fuck that bitch". I don't know the specifics of your relationship or its' woes, but what I do know is that you don't treat another human being like this. Anyway, don't be too worried. Think about where she might have taken the kids. She must have her own support network, somewhere she left to, and chances are you know this person, or at least know of them. Or does she have her own source of income / way to pay for a flat or so? What she did is entirely illegal - it's kidnapping, plain and simple. And to also have stolen all your home appliances? Yeah, in the eyes of the law she's a thief, and a kidnapper. The fact that she never tried salvaging the relationship, along with stealing things, and kidnapping your kids, means that if this ever goes to court, there is no way in hell she will ever get custody of the kids, even considering the fact that the courts usually favour the mother.
You should get in touch with a lawyer, ASAP, begin preparing your case. Don't hesitate, don't give her any benefit of the doubt, don't hope for her to come to her senses. For someone to so heartlessly leave the father of her children out in the cold like that, while you're dealing with health issues, and to have planned this move 3 weeks in advance, means that there is no sense in trying to find a middle path. She wants to lock you out fully, and has taken the offensive. Try to find any proof of purchase / bills of any of the stuff she stole, and your kids' birth certificates, and get in touch with that lawyer, pronto. Also, report this kidnapping and theft to the police - after you sit down and think long and hard about all potential places she might have taken the kids. That way, you can tell the police all the places they should look. Go to the station in person to do this. You could mention that you're worried about where she's going / what she'll do with the kids, as her behaviour is erratic and unstable, to help motivate the cops to really hunt her down.
I'm adding you on Steam so you can vent some, and we can talk about this further. I have a sister who unfortunately was embroiled in similar situations.
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I know exactly where she's gone because a letter came for her, a standing order-type thing for a 3 bedroom house she got from the local housing association
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i'm very sorry to hear that, i've been having a rough time myself but this is on a whole 'nother level. i hope everything sorts itself out for you. don't worry about needing to post your feelings somewhere, not everyone is a social butterfly.
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/r/thathappened
Sorry op, but I doubt you would be spending the time to post this here instead of filing police reports for kidnapping of your children and theft of property. I also question the fact that you entered and left in 15mins for an x-ray. Its also odd how you needed the receptionist to ring her, but then say while you are walking around the hospital that you rang her yourself.
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I'm not going to the police. Kids need BOTH their parents in some capacity. If you did read it, you'd have noticed that it took nearly an hour and a half for the X-ray to happen
There are also these inventions, fairly new but you may have heard of them. They're called public payphones
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I think you should reconsider not going to the police. Yes, kids should have both their parents, but it seems to me that your wife is trying to keep you from them, so they WON'T have both their parents. Also, would you really want your kids to be with someone who did something so horribly cruel, even if it is their mother?
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Even if in a legal mean she did kidnap her own kids, I doubt she really did it, not talking legally. I really don't know the situation there, but I guess she does love her children, even though she has problem with the husband(PhantomTa2). They should indeed solve it between the two of them, instead of it harming the children life.
I do wish you, Phantom, the best, and I hope your week will be much better. And please, try not to get advice from the internet. Yes, we probably all here want to help, and we might have been through these kind of situations, but we need to really know what's going on, and how the 2 of you feel to each other in order to really help. That's why you need to see a specialist. I know the reason you wrote it isn't to get help, but just to get it out of your chest(or at least this is how it seemed to me).
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Wow, that's bad. If I were you I'd get a lawyer to fight for custody.
A week ago. I lost both an girlfriend and a friend in the same blow. We were ex's before. Third time was not the charm. We were together, she finally said she was feeling uncomfortable and told me that the guy she was staying with, an ex of hers now since she can't afford a place of her own right now, she never told him it was over. That was the third time she hurt me so I politley told her that I can't do this anymore and its time we went our seperate ways. She has been raging all last week. I hear things. So I can sympathise with you.
Again, I say get a lawyer on your wife.
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first of all that sounds like a terrible week and I feel sorry for you.
However:
I won't form an opinion in relationship matters until I've heard the other side. So no I won't say "fuck that bitch" even if that's what you'd like me to say.
I'm not a fan of "putting it out there" online, these details are pretty intimate and not our business. Seek a specialist maybe?
Anyway I wish you'll get better and get your life settled.
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I just can't bring myself to really buy this story. There are just some things that seem off to me. If this really happened to you though, then I'm sorry.
I'll be playing the devil's advocate here right now, but I'm just saying that, if your story is true, the chance of you getting full custody for the kids are not 100% when you get a divorce.
Her lawyer will put everything like she is protecting the kids from you. You yourself said you have huge health issues, constant pain and also need to use a cane for simple walking. I assume you are on medication too? Now, her lawyer would probably build on top of that. Meaning he will put everything like that so it seems you are unstable and not fit to be a father to your kids. That's why she had to leave. To protect the kids. They will point out you would not be fit to raise the children accordingly due to your health issues.
But that's just my thinking. Anyway that's the way I would act as a lawyer.
But, I won't judge. I don't know the whole story. People don't act like that for no reason. Anyway, if this is true, then ... well, yeah that sucks hard.
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+1 There are lots of people out there with severe mental issues, this story could be just the fabrication of the desperate need for attention. I've heard even more intricate stories made up by such people.
"Lots of folks say lots of things on the interwebs" by Benjamin Franklin
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Better than being diagnosed with suicidal thoughts and panic attacks.
Hope things will work out for you.
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Sorry if you didn't understand my post fully, not a native speaker, I was talking about my personal experience, I have been diagnosed with suicidal thoughts and panic attacks.
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Can't be diagnosed with that, go look for a better doc if you are.
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A couple of days ago, I had to go to hospital for an X-ray of my chest to see if the pains I've been having, and the weakness and short of breath, were cardiac or not. My wife woke me at 10:00 and said, "Come on, we needs to get this X-ray done to find out what's going on". "How nice", I thought, "My wife is concerned". So we went to the hospital 8 miles away for the X-ray. It got to about 11:00 and she goes, "Oh, I parked on the side of the road, I'm going to go park in the car park". Fair enough, right?. So anyway, my X-ray comes and goes and it's about 11:15 and I couldn't find her. So I asked the receptionist guy to ring her to find out where she was. He rang, she answered and told him she was just getting a space, she'd be back in 5 minutes. I waited 10 minutes, no sign of her, so he rang again, no answer. I went to all the car parks, not an easy task for me, I can't walk without a stick and it's extremely painful, and no sign of her. So I rang, no answer. I went around that entire hospital, ringing pretty much all the time with no answer, for an hour and a half. Eventually, it got to 13:30 so I rang my mother to ask her if she could pick me up. So she did. I got home to an empty house.
My wife had basically abandoned me at the hospital, knowing I couldn't get back, and used that time to move herself and my 2 kids, who are the only people I can truly say I unconditionally love, out of the house. And it turns out that she had been planning this for over 3 weeks. Not once did she try to talk to me to try to save the marriage. Not once did she even give me a hint that this was what she was thinking. So, you think you're having a bad week? Just be glad your wife hasn't stolen your 2 children and left you with an empty house, the only source of communication, and entertainment, being this one PC. Everything else has gone. She even took the microwave, kettle and toaster! What a fucking shitty week I've had, am I right?
Anyway, thanks for letting me vent, I don't really have friends to talk to so it's kind of therapeutic to have posted this. I really, honestly, hope you're all having a better week than I'm having.
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