The jokes thread.[post yours here]

What do you call the bit of extra skin around the vajayjay?

The rest of the woman. ;(

Yo mama so fat she eats breakfast off of a tectonic plate.

In a world without humor, there is only... MORGAN FREEMAN!

No, but less seriously, a man, a rabbi, and a man with a club foot go into a subway. The normal guy orders a BLT, the Rabbi orders it Kosher, and the man with a club foot says "What kind of sandwhich do you have for a guy like me"? The barista responds "only a ham club, because you've already got one foot in it sir".

Keeping things on a cleaner note than my last ones...

• How do you tell the difference between a stoat and a weasel?
  • One is weaselly identifiable and the other is stoatally different!

    ---

• How is cheese made in Wales?
  • Caerphilly
• Which cheese is made backwards?
  • Edam
• What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?
  • Halloumi
• What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
  • Nacho cheese
• What cheese can you entice grizzlys down from a mountain with?
  • Camembert

(You could even say those jokes were cheesy. Too cheesy by far.)

I was gonna tell joke about Jews but what if I burn it :(

If a man runs over a woman with his car, who is at fault?
Better question: Why was the man driving in the kitchen?

why are there no penguins in the UK?.... because they're affraid of Wales hihihi

A husband comes home and sees his wife with her legs spread in front of the oven, he asks "what are you doing" she responds "keeping your dinner warm".

Booyah

i am walking on the street and them boooommm HotDog ;]

[Starcraft II joke]
Why did collos fell over? Because he was imbalanced.

It's 03:00 AM, a student calls his teacher at home, wakes him up and asks: " Where you sleeping ?", teacher answers : " Yes, why are't you ? ", " Because I have to study you AS HOLE!!!", student hangs up.

A chubby man walks in to a health club because he want's to loose some weight. They have three options from which he can choose: small, medium or large. Well he chooses the small one just to see if it works.

He enters a room where a beautifull girl is sitting. The girl has a sign that says "catch me and I'll make love to you". He catches her and sure enough he had lost a bit of weight.

Now he wants more so he chooses the medium. He walks in to the room where a beutifull model is sitting with a sign that says "catch me and I'll make love to you". He catches her and sure enough he lost even more weight this time.

Now he wante the large because this is just great. But... when he enters the room there's a big ugly man with a sign that says "I'll catch you and make love to you!"

Hope I didn't offend anyone it sure was not my meaning :-) Btw I've only heard the joke in danish so sorry if came out lame when translated.

Hmm

What do you call a clown that eats people?

• A carnibal!

(This is mine. No taking. I'm freaking serious.)