I dunno why am I starting a topic... maybe because this was the 'last' forum I visited. Maybe because this was the last forum I really enjoyed being a part of. Or maybe because I just need to say something, and this seems like a right place to do it.
I had a nasty fallout with my... well no longer, best friend. We've known each other for 15 years, since we were eight years old. We stuck through everything, bad and good, and then things just fell apart. Within few days everything that ever connected us, everything that ever made us friends just disappeared. It would be a lie to say that he was the only one who let his bad side come out but I have a such an ugly feeling. Emptiness, sadness... like someone stabbed me right in the chest and I'm struggling to take even one breath. It's scary because he was one of those friends you think are going to be your friends for life and you call brothers. What is even worse is that it happened so fast. Like a blast, out of nowhere it just felt like someone swept the rug from our feet and... it's awful. In a big way, it's my fault. I was the one who got pissed because he got the habit of always being late and started making fun of me for no apparent reason in some things. After the last mistake he made (not showing up and letting me stand on rain for an hour and not even apologising for it and even worse, making it look like I'm overreacting) I got pissed and tried to explain him where he made a mistake but all he thought was that I was furious over money (5€ i paid for ticket). When I tried to explain my thoughts he ridiculed me and I just flipped and...
I know this isn't 'that' type of forum but this is the last forum I've really enjoyed and I just needed somewhere to vent it out. I'm lost. Last few hours I've spent mostly staring at wall trying to see where things went awry, where the shit hit the fan. I have to admit I'm scared. I'm hard on people and find it really hard to befriend anyone. I... I'm just scared...
Edit: Thanks guys, I'm really feeling much better now! So much better that I'm gonna start trolling the forum any moment now! :D

THANKS for all the nice comments! :)

1 decade ago*

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gimme tl;dr

1 decade ago
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...

1 decade ago
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Empathy level down

1 decade ago
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:'(

1 decade ago
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I know that feel brah.
My former best friend (for more than 15yrs) betrayed me.

You will get over it and finally realize you are better of without him.

1 decade ago
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very easy to get over it, friends are pointless wastes of time, im 25 never had a friend in my life, and im glad for it

1 decade ago
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nobody wants to hang out with a killer either.

1 decade ago
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Oh, having contacts to killers can be quite practical at times, I say.

1 decade ago
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Sorry that happened dude :(

1 decade ago
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Deleted

This comment was deleted 3 years ago.

1 decade ago
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+1

1 decade ago
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It seems to me like too much of a emotional bond. I mean I have friends that I know for over 16 years and we don't make such a fuss over little things no more cause they come and go.

Maybe it was meant to be.

1 decade ago
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I have had big fights with longtime friends sometimes over stuff like this. In the end though you get over it and start being friends again.

1 decade ago
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I am sorry for you :( i lost my best friend when i was 16 and was horrible.. i cried for a week.. she just stopped to talk to me because she prefered another friend that was more cool than me.. since that day i am friend of some selected people but i dont want call best friend no one anymore since that.. maybe you will have your bf back, maybe not.. but talk about your feelings always helps

1 decade ago
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I guess that the moment you lose your best childhood friend you really do lose the 'best' friend. What hurts the most is how it happened, how little it took for that bubble to burst and everything to simply come out. Even worse are the things he said, the way he ridiculed me. Maybe I should have expected it, maybe I should have seen it coming but I didn't. You don't expect that someone you respect and think of as a brother would turn the guns on you the very first moment he gets the chance.

1 decade ago
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i know that feeling, when you didnt want to see that the lonely person that cared about that friendship is you..now are passed ten years but it still hurts if i think about.. she didnt deserve my respect and your not anymore best friend does not deserve your respect too.. but it hurts anyway..

1 decade ago
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"when you didnt want to see that the lonely person that cared about that friendship is you"
Spot on. I've got nothing more to add but huge THANKS. You are the one who really cheered me up because you understand. And all these nice comments are really cheering me up. I guess it's the life's circle. Sometimes, somewhere it had to happen. No doubt it'll always hurt, when you're close with someone so much that you care about them even though they don't care about you...
But I hope that I'll turn it into something positive now.

1 decade ago
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I can only said...that if he did that ALWAYS...well.. it wasn't your friend..i got 2 friends and we know each other more than 20 years now.. Of course maybe we got angry, but for small things,and then we laugh about that... But a real friend, will understand your feels and stopped doing what maked u sad..

1 decade ago
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If your story is true the way you stated it, you were not in the wrong. Sounds like the guy had no respect for your time or feelings and had been like that way for a long time. You put up with it for all that time and finally couldn't. If this was the first time he was late or mocked you, then you would've overreacted but if this was common behavior from his side, and he still couldn't see it, well, you don't have any reason to feel you were wrong aside from losing a 15 year friendship.

1 decade ago
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it sucks. been there done that.
but there is good thing - with time you will actually see all the flaws in this friendship.

1 decade ago
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If you did so much to him, he'll feel the lost.

1 decade ago
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"After the last mistake he made (not showing up and letting me stand on rain for an hour and not even apologising for it and even worse, making it look like I'm overreacting)"

OH MY GOD THAT IS UNFORGIVABLE IF ANYONE DID THAT TO ME I WOULD SHOOT THEM RIGHT IN THE FACE OH MY GOD

1 decade ago
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HE was at fault here. :P He should apologize.

1 decade ago
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I myself have had a best friend for a year now. even with large arguments we sucked it up, apologised and went onto gaming again. my advice to you is to see whether he is worth it. if he is, just talk to him and explain. if he does not accept things in that manner he cannot be your friend.

1 decade ago
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Well, my best friend is my best friend because we understand (and maybe because of that respect) each other like no one. I guess that's what makes a real best friend. You know, I'm 20 years old but I've come to realize that people are terrified of being alone. Some people don't grasp the meaning of friendship, just want someone to care for them but not the other way around. Some people don't call you friend because they really mean it, but because they don't want to be alone and want someone to care and help them through their life.

I don't know if that's the case with the person you mentioned, but I'm sure of this: If he really was your best friend then he certainly will miss you like you do, then he will wonder what went wrong like you do and then he will come to realise that (probably) both of you are at fault. If he was your best friend he understands you and he will eventually realize that such a puny thing cannot be enough to shatter a friendship of 15 years. It doesn't make any sense, does it? If he can throw away a friendship like that for something like this then that reveals that he does not understand you and as such cannot forgive you. That is not a best friend, imo.

If he really was your best friend then rest assured, he still is and will probably be forever.

1 decade ago
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i hate people who is always late.
i had a friend just like that(not my best friend though just a friend :) ), just the same in every aspect. one day i broke it off and i am very much happier now.
it feels good not to wait for anyone all the time. Now i only play online games with him and nothing more.
i even changed his phonebook name to "hisname"patient zero. cause i didn't think there were any human being like that :)
i guess i need to change that now.
don't worry you will feel better in a couple of days.
gotta stay away from people who can't keep their promises and be late all the time.

1 decade ago
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With the title I thought he was dead... :s

1 decade ago
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Same here.

1 decade ago
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Me too

1 decade ago
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And me.

1 decade ago
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he probably is

1 decade ago
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Get drunk with other friends. Problem solved.

1 decade ago
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I don't drink but really, right now (at the age of 23, alone, depressed and generally tired of all bullshit in my life) I feel like it's about time for me to have a pint and relax. It won't kill me (hopefully)

1 decade ago
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don't do it, enter to a fight club and waste all your rage and fury in the arena. drugs will not take that felling or fill what's empty.

Have you tried to cry? to hug some random people? go to some place that you never been and turn off all contact to the world(TV,internet)? you should try

1 decade ago
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Friendship is magic

1 decade ago
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Will watch. Thanks! I love shorts! Netherland dwarf is one of my favourites :D

1 decade ago
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hope you enjoy it.

1 decade ago
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how about, losing every friend because you break your back in a bad car accident and dont have money... friends for 15+ years. it gets better, you stop caring, shrug.

1 decade ago
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We're very similar, I just decided not to really bother with people anymore too much unless I'm invited by someone, I rarely still bother asking people to come and chill and what not. Instead I spend my time getting in shape (dieting & working out), browsing the internet & gaming.

1 decade ago
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friEND

1 decade ago
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How is this the end of a friendship, just talk about it and accept the differences between you two (and don't be dependent of him, so you don't need to wait all the time).

1 decade ago
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It's not your fault dude. If you were upset with him you should have let him known. Good friends are supposed to be able to talk about stuff that's bothering them about the other person, so that they could then change it and not only improve the quality of the friendship, but also help improve them as a person. If they're a good friend they'll undoubtedly try to do something about their actions.

If that small misunderstanding was what triggered the breakdown then I'm gonna have to say that there must have been a lot of issues in the friendship to begin with and that was just the catalyst it needed to finally blow up. Still though, unless you went nuts and made all kinds of personal attacks at him when you told him of the mistake, it's not your fault. He should be the one to apologize to you. If he doesn't come around to apologize in a while then I'm sorry, doesn't sound like he was as invested in the relationship as you were and eventually something similar probably would have happened.

It's fine to be scared and to take time to think about it, but just like a bad breakup from a girlfriend, you gotta just try to move on. He wasn't respecting you that much as a friend, so again unless he mans up and apologizes, there's not much you can do about this.

1 decade ago
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It's small things that amounted to something big and eventually the bubble just exploded.

1 decade ago
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It really seems to me that you're either hiding some details or exaggerating on a story that wouldn't be a 15-year-old friendship breaker on its own. Sometimes you just have to let things slide and stop taking such things personally.

1 decade ago
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Closed 1 decade ago by bull21.