AGE/WEIGHT/SHOESIZE.you forgot that.It also depends how,in what context & her age but the age is one of the things u shouldnt ask so yeah :P like,for girls i guess it's ok to ask but lol :P
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Completely rude. These are things you learn in time without asking really.
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I realize its rude, but what always gets me is WHY?
Men in general do not worry about this sort of questioning, and I guess women are more into looks and fashion than men, thus, this stuff is more important for them, so I guess I have no idea why I posted this in the forum, time killer maybe?
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Because women. Don't even try to understand them.
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Some things just don't have answers. It's not a matter of not understanding... no amount of reason, logic, understanding, technology or advancement will ever give you an answer simply because it just doesn't exist.
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That's just the thing. Men don't care so they answer freely. Women do care, They like to feel in control of how you perceive them, so they keep private information like that on the chance that you'll appreciate them more if you think them younger and slimmer. There's a bit more to it than that but that is the basic gist of it.
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You have to remember that women "read into" what is said and done. If you ask a woman "How old are you?" or "How much do you weigh?" she will will hear "You look too old/young," or "You need to get in shape." How she feels about you implying those things will depend upon the woman and her own sense of self. In general, however, it's better if you just "don't go there."
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IT's not rude. If she get's pissy because you ask a simple question then she is a $%^&* and needs to stop falling into television stereotypes.
OP, would you care if she asked you? I didn't think so.
People need to get over themselves, We are all the same on the inside, everybody poops and no one is better than anyone else.
Just ask her if you wan to know.
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It's rude to ask personal information such as weight, salary, age and so.
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There is no rigid formality in socializing in China??? How can you have spent any time living in China and say that? There are a whole slew of rules and expected behavior patterns that are part of that culture. Just because they happen to be different than American customs and social rules doesn't mean they don't exist.
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Actually, the rigidness does exist, but when and how it manifests itself is different.
We're making generalizations about human behavior, here, which is always problematic. Human beings share similar behavior patterns, but each culture's style (and even each individual's style) varies. It isn't that a behavior pattern doesn't exist in one culture or another, it just manifests itself differently based upon that culture.
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Stereotypes are similar to lies in that there is an amount of truth behind them. These things are portrayed in media because it actually is very common. Women are very conscientious about their appearance, and age and weight play large roles in it.
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It's on par with a woman asking you what your monthly income is, or how many sexual partners you've had. Not only is the information unimportant, asking about it implies criticism and discussing it can lead to conflict.
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income and sexual partner count is very important when looking for a life long mate. Granted, they both can be handled or lowered in importance, but they are valid metrics for long term relationships outside of gold diggers. Even for one night stands, number of sexual partners does have its own set of valid data points. What if she does or doesnt want a virgin? etc.
In the context of general chatter though, they serve as fuel to progress knowledge. Thats how I see it anyway.
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General, day-to-day conversation is a context entirely different from that of a probe for relevant (private) information regarding the progression of a long-term relationship.
The OP was about why women are offended by certain questions. Generally speaking, people find it rude when private information is sought outside of a proper context. For women, the subjects of age and weight are sensitive ones and are considered private information. This is not usually the case with men. Men have other areas which they consider sensitive and/or private.
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So, you're saying that women with anorexia and bulimia who are recovering just need to get over themselves? You know that weight-related discussions can cause relapses, right? You know that women are judged everyday based on their looks, bodies, age, weight, whatever and found wanting, right? By everybody, all the time.
Men absolutely don't have to put up with the same level of scrutiny and bullshit that women have to put up with regarding their bodies. It's not a question of "falling into television stereotypes". Women are outright told, everywhere they go and everywhere they look that they're not good enough if they're not thin and thin isn't ever thin enough. Weight is a taboo subject because women are judged on their weight in ways that men almost never are. It's not a question of no one being better than anyone else. In terms of freedom from weight-related prejudice, men are better than anyone else. They can be a little fat - or even a lot fat - and get almost no comments about it. How many women can say the same? The obsession over weight and thinness creates scars that women have to deal with their entire lives. Don't add to those scars, be compassionate instead. Be a friend and not an asshole.
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If you just met them, you should avoid this question, but as yyd518 said, it depends on the woman and of course it also depends how you ask and in what context.
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Actually, that depend on the culture, the status & age of the asker (above or below the woman in question ).... but that only ask about age, question about her weight is rude no matter where you are
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I cannot think of a reason to ask her her weight .. cept for if you are going on a Ride at the Fair .. and theres a weight limit and ...
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Before they reach X age (X depending on the person) they are ashamed they are young, after they pass X age, they are ashamed they are old. And the X age lasts 1 day.
Never try to understand women, for to look into that ambis is to call upon it to look back at you.
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..... you make my yaoi goggle mode turn on with that comment
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lol @ Jerry.
It is considered rude by majority therefore it is rude. It may not be for you but for most women it is. So I'd be careful with those kind of qustions if I were you.
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So if the majority considers you an apple, you're an apple ?God,how I love illogical crap like what's rude or not.
You want to know why they consider it rude ? Because they were told it is rude(that's true for over 90% of them).
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And I love people who think just because they think differently than others they deserve their say to be the most important. Fine, you don't think it's rude? No problemo. But don't be surprised if people around you will (and they will) consider it rude. I, myself, think that asking a newly met woman about her weight is not as much rude as just... stupid. There are just some things you don't do. Is that really so important anyway? You see how a woman looks like, you can tell from the beginning if you like her or not. What the information about weight changes? Plus, I think that judging a woman on her weight is as shallow as it can get.
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I'm not talking about weight,I'm talking about age.(agree,asking about weight is plain dumb and who does that?)
I never asked a woman about weight because firstly I don't really care and second I know it's a "touchy" subject and it's really none of my business.But I don't like when I'm considered rude because I'm genuinely interested in a woman's age.
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Yeah, I agree with you on this one. Asking about age is normal for me too.
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I don't think she'd be particularly happy with either question, but if you had to choose one, definitely go for age.
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That might be stretching the analogy. A person's weight is still very possible to guesstimate using information that is public knowledge (i.e. looking at the person). I can understand people being apprehensive about it, but it's not like it's a completely private matter
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You don't ask her age, you ask her to view each others ID pictures.
You don't ask her weight, you ask her to weigh her pet. This way she will stand on the scale with the pet in her lap. Later you can subtract the pets weight and voila.
Or you start any rude sentence/question with "No disrespect, but.." ,heh, pretty sure the age asking thing only goes for dames and with the current state of youth you can(actually you should) ask most "ladies". What the hell do you need someones weight anyway? Unless there are like 10 people on an elevator and a girl is trying to press on as eleventh, but you need to be sure she doesn't break the weight limit. It's not like women are some irrational dimwits, that instantly go on a killing spree when you ask how much they weigh. If there's a reason, you ask and you'll get a reply. As you would with any normal reasonable person.
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Depends on the community of people that you are dealing with. In some circles, it is considered rude not to talk about obvious things, such as someone gaining a lot of weight. This is part of what divides people from different cultures. You are conditioned to believe that everyone thinks the same way as you. Once you start viewing people as individuals who will have their own reaction and not necessarily your preconceived reaction, you'll notice that most people don't actually get offended by such questions as often as you think. Also, if you think you are being rude by asking, you are more likely to phrase the question in an awkward or rude manner, thereby ensuring you will get the reaction you expect.
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I'm very against many kinds of social norms. The thing to be polite to people just because that's how we do it in the 21th century, I think that is fake. If people are polite even if they don't like the person and start talking and seem nice and then walk away and think "damn that guy is totally fucked up in the head". If a guy doesn't want to talk to one another, then I think we should tell him that. People would probably get offended, but that's just because that's what we have learned to do. "not to ask about a womans weight" is one of these social norms that's just absolutely silly.
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Wrong. Women recovering from eating disorders absolutely need not to be asked about their weight. It can halt or even damage their recovery to have weight-related conversations because it brings up all the things they're trying to stop obsessing over. Seriously, you need to stop and think about why you feel entitled to ask a question like that when you know it's none of your business.
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Because every guy walks around town and asks every girl about her weight,right ?
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just respect the person to whom you are talking 2. If it doesn't work out it doesn't work out. Trying out all kind of pickup games and stuff like that is just laughable. When the lady is comfortable enough to tell her age she will. the same as her weight. But nowadays everybody, or most of the people have a facebook so you can check that out before or after you meet each other.
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"So, what year did you graduate from highschool?"
"If you were a boxer, what category would you fit into?"
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Question says it all.
I am not talking about someone who is clearly overweight, I mean in a situation where you are genuinely wondering and you have a neutral relationship with them, just met them
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