❓
[Abstract Arena](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/oplXP/abstract-arena) - Level 5 | icaio | December 24th
last bump 12 hours ago?
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[Grass Cutter](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/IjLaS/grass-cutter) - Level 6 | icaio | December 24th
'cause
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Refill!
[A Fistful of Gun(http://www.sgtools.info/giveaways/234705d2-d823-11e7-b317-fa163ee2f826) - level 0 SGTools | talgaby | 2017-12-15
[Foul Play](http://www.sgtools.info/giveaways/8439e2a3-d823-11e7-b317-fa163ee2f826) - level 0 SGTools | talgaby | 2017-12-15
[Midnight Mysteries Collection](http://www.sgtools.info/giveaways/f34d364e-d822-11e7-b317-fa163ee2f826) - level 0 SGTools | talgaby | 2017-12-15Comment has been collapsed.
If you are alone... games and studies can be your friends ;3
Udacity - free courses and nanodegrees
[Uurnog Uurnlimited](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/zUo6s/uurnog-uurnlimited) - Level 1 | Lilith | December 9th
[Tiny Echo](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/NKYpI/tiny-echo) - Level 1 | Lilith | December 10th
[Sakura Fantasy](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/fENs3/sakura-fantasy) - Level 1 | Lilith | December 15th
[Screencheat](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/YbdwV/screencheat) - Level 1 | Lilith | December 16th
[Hurtworld](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/SYm3Y/hurtworld) - Level 1 | Lilith | December 17th
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[Robot Heroes](https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/CPOC9/robot-heroes) - Level 5 | icaio | December 24th
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Ranting about stupid and depressing stuff has always fascinated me. It's always like people pretend to care but in reality they think the person complaining is just looking for attention and yet their caring always comes off as a legitimate worry towards their well being. It's something I've been thinking about for a while now. I'm a well of depressing thoughts, I'm a work of art in the dumbest way possible. I guess in a sense I just like to feel like shit all the time because I feel like my life is just terrible beyond my control but realistically I'm a huge idiot and really I just am never able to do anything right. It's a hard thing to think about because growing up I always thought that people with 'issues' were "special" people but as I grew up more and more, I had issue after issue just flood into my life and I just kind of ignored it but now I feel like everything invades my thoughts all the time, and I find myself insulting myself more and more every day even about the smallest things. Sorry I've been drinking a little bit. Fucking hell, I'm going to regret this tomorrow. I've wasted enough of people's time ranting my stupid problems on this server enough and being a big enough of a nuisance. and really it's just going to depreciate my 'reputation' on this server, it's just this thing I do. I slip into a community unnoticed and do these waves of random stupid awkward moments and then eventually leave because I'm just so ignorable. I can never do it, contriubte something to a relationship/connection.
Even if someday I find friends who pity me and be friends with me for the pit aspect, it'll never be real. I guess one day I just gave up and realised I'm a huge burden of a person, and I just can't help it. it's such a frustrating feeling to feel like no matter what your life will never change and improve, you'll never meet new people or improve yourself personally. I mean jesus I almost broke my arm today probably because I'm a weak idiot. You're free to ignore this, I'm just really being an idiot writing this post, it's such a big waste of space and time and I'm sure I look like an idiot writing this whiny fucking crap. I've gotta stop whining my problems away to a stupid screen because no one cares
Sorry I'm just ranting about how I feel this week, month, year. I really just hate everything. I'm sick of all of it and it doesn't even matter where I post, it's just throwing my stupid thoughts into the void. I'm a big annoying burden for people to satifying every once in a while. I'm gone
I'm off to sleep my shitty feelings off
Just reposting my stupid thoughts from somewhere else from just a few minutes ago. It's hard to think that there's someone out there waiting for you and that you have a spot in life, especially when your life has always been full of some kind of pain, loneliness, and stagnation. It's hard to think that there's something waiting for you when you think that everyone you interact with you is just tolerating you until you go away, or that they're making fun of you or that your mistakes just build up to be this reputation for yourself as some kind of mess up.I feel like threads like these embody a sense of wanting to care and reach out to others but sometimes it's hard to feel like you deserve that helping hand or to feel like people care enough to lend that helping hand, because really it's hard to believe that anyone can ever really understand your own situation and care enough to even listen to you. It's also really scary to approach anyone and ask for help, especially when you don't have anyone personal to you in the first place and feel like you'll be left alone the next day anyways
I'm not going to remember any of this if only by, at the very least, the willpower of myself to never remember ever posting anything dramatic and serious
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I'm hesitant to reply to this because I know how it is sometimes when you want to just shout into the void and how startlingly unpleasant it can be when it turns out that someone heard and responds back (especially when it's typically "it'll get better" or something similar). But I relate to this too damn much. The constant self-beration; the perpetual feeling that not only am I pointlessly bringing everyone around me down by existing; that everything wrong in my life could have been avoided if I were just smarter about things. Like I'm too dumb to live, but life just won't let me go. And people can say "But there are still people who love you, who would be sad if you were gone," but it's hard to believe in that when the very people who are supposed to love you unconditionally have abandoned you or have literally said to your face that you were a mistake and that they wish they were dead.
I spent so many years hoping that, like everyone says, "it'll get better," but it's impossible to do alone. And it is really awful and scary to ask for help, but if you just have one person that you feel like you can trust, please just reach out to them. For me, it's my sister. I've always been withdrawn, even with people I'm "close" to, never letting them too close, practically physically unable to tell them certain things. But this summer when we were texting, I'd gotten to a point where I was just so beyond caring that when I told her I felt like shit and she asked what was wrong, I just straight up told her I wanted to die. And then of course beat myself up to hell and back because why would you tell the one person you care about the most something that would hurt them so bad? But ultimately I'm more or less glad I did. We got to spend a lot more time together than we otherwise would have when she visited, and she calls me more frequently now to check in and give me suggestions like: even if you don't go outside, at least shower and change to feel better. And a friend recently encouraged me to start setting daily goals, even if they're just small things. Doing dishes or laundry, reading a chapter of a book, taking a walk. As long as I have something to focus on and can accomplish, I'll feel just that much better. And sometimes I'm unable to shake the dark cloud and get nothing done that day, and that's okay. It's all about baby steps. Even the smallest smidge of progress is progress.
It is really hard to believe that eventually you'll get to a point where you're okay and you don't have to dread how soon until life takes its next swing at you, but I have to hope that it's possible or I'd probably fall back apart again.
I don't know if this helped (at the very least I really hope it didn't hurt or make things worse). I know that the holidays can be a godawful time for people with depression and such, and I'm really not the best option at all, but if you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you.
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I'm sorry I was just having a bad week and had an emotional outburst. I'm just a silly idiot and all that
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hey, don't feel bad for ranting, it's better than keeping everything to yourself.
even if it sounds weird or silly it helps a lot to write or just talk to someone. ^^
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well thanks, I just feel bad about murking up your thread. My problems just feel like everyday issues compared to everyone else
also, I'm bringing this back up after 2 days but I didn't want to leave comments unanswered
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I appreciate the comment, though. Unfortunately I have these occasional outbursts because I don't really have anyone to talk to for help, support, or whatever. It's a rough time. I mean, I probably don't even have it that bad but my every day life is just me constantly feeling like shit, useless, stupid, etc. I barely even manage to grin and bare it.
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Everyone has their own hardships. Trying to compare them objectively isn't fair to you. You're having a difficult time. Life is fucking hard. Especially so when you are your own worst enemy and have a hell of a time thinking of yourself positively.
But I understand. Like I said before, I wasn't even sure I should respond at all since I know sometimes it helps to just blast feelings straight into the void. But it can also be relieving to know someone heard and knows how hard it is. I know it's not my place to say, but I believe that if you have even just one person you can lean on, to talk to and help you shoulder your burden even just a little, it would help you to feel a bit better.
I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable though. Just know that one tiny speck of a person in that void is thinking of you, rooting for you, and hopes things get better for you.
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Original thread - Original Post by DesertMouse1
I've dealt with depression for over a decade, plus PTSD and some health complications which also make things even worse than what they are. But at least I had people that helped me. Friends, family, and even strangers from support groups that made things easier.
You should NEVER think you are alone, because there's always someone willing to help if you look around you. This might sound cliché but it's real, there are terrible people but there are also extremely kind ones. 💙
Also, if you can and you feel strong enough, please lend a hand to others in need. I've done this for years when I am confident enough that I can take on other people's problems without affecting my health to the point of getting me down.
Remember it's important to help others, but also take care of yourself.
Diagnosed depression isn't a joke (as in diagnosed by a professional and not by the patient, don't confuse it with other symptoms!). It's a serious condition and it shouldn't be taken lightly because it's not a physical illness. Just like cancer ends up with death, depression will escalate to suicide or cripple you in many ways.
Everyone feels "down" once in a while, but for some people it's a daily pattern of depression. The good news is that it is treatable.
Usually through therapy, medication, or a combination of the two. Antidepressant medication, despite some side effects, can help lift a person from the depths of depression within weeks of starting medication therapy.
If one medication doesn't work for you or the side effects are too much for you to live with, keep in mind that there are many others your doctor could give you to try.
Make sure your doctor knows about any other meds you are taking and always ask questions about your medication therapy, if needed.
Btw, DON'T get self-diagnosed, it's a terrible idea. You might be sad or during a grieving period, so always check with a doctor.
Besides, I don't know about other countries but over here antidepressants are only available if you have a medical prescription, so you will only be left with a possibly wrong diagnostic and no way to deal with it.
Some info:
What Is Depression?
Google users can now screen themselves for depression, then seek treatment
Taking Care of Yourself While Supporting a Depressed Loved One
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