What's your favourite insult?

Numpty!

Idjit

Loved Yosemite Sam as a kid...hell, still do...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yobj1Zv91KA

Back in the day I had a Mass Effect 3 buddy from Scotland who was hilarious (may God rest his soul) and I have to say nobody curses like a Scotsman :D

I like a bit of british flavour in my lingo so my go to insults would be twat (or the american equivalent but both only towards men) or prick.

I like Wanker, but it sounds best when stated by someone with a British (or similar) accent.

Useless paperclip. Although I never use it.

Je m'en badigeonne les couilles avec le pinceau de l'indifférence

My favorite would probably be dipshit. I almost never use it though, because rarely is someone worthy of me using my favorite insult on them and I don't insult people that often anyway.

My favorite French insults are "I fart in your general direction" and "Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person" :)
https://youtu.be/A8yjNbcKkNY?t=1m17s

I also liked some insults from the game Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator

View attached image.

View attached image.

Your brain, is as dry as a biscuit after a long voyage !

Too many to say. I use SO many insults because I meet SO many people that deserve it.

But my favorite thing is to make these people think. Especially when an irritating person says to me 'Can I ask you a question'. I just tell them that they already did. And when they see if they can ask another, I repeat the line. Over and over. Hoping they finally figure it out. Rarely do they ever do. The masses that don't get mad and walk away as if their lack of intelligence has been insulted.

Game, set and match.

no u

Your mother was a hamster, and your father smells of elderberries!

Wanker, even though I'm not English and never use it myself

"La puta que te pario" or "la concha de tu hermana".

Douche doesn't really mean shower (although it does in French). It's short from "douchebag" which is actually a sort of a vagina rinsing device, which makes it even funnier.

I think somebody on this site recently used "douche nozzle" as an insult, I laughed a lot at that one.

fagots! ^^ ("pidory" in russian)

You look like fiat multipla xD

All of these - mostly the "tupéd fucktrumpet"
I'm also fond of the world twat :D
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLrk7mUdla0

your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries

Calling people "shower" is quite funny.

Short version:
You're actually calling them a "spray of water used for the intent of cleaning the body", and the intended implication is something far more offensive.

Long version:

Actually, douche refers to fluids directed against or into the body, for the intent of cleansing it. While in other regions the "against" usage may be dominant, such as in referring to a shower, in North America the second usage is by far the more dominant, and thus "douche" refers to internal cleansing, such as by an enema or in reference to vaginal, nasal, or aural douching. As such, to "douche yourself" would mean to clean your insides out, and thus from that perspective an insult with that phrasing could be considered somewhat comparable to phrases such as "stick it up your ass".

Likewise, working off of that foundation of meaning, the overall implication of the word as it's used as an insult can be seen to have an intuitive relation to implying that the other party is dirty or skeevy, and thus are needing to be cleaned (perhaps from the inside-out). It'd be nice to be able to just assume that or the previous interpretation formed the basis for the word, and leave it at that, especially given that modern usage [of "contemptible person"] for the insult seems to best fit to this interpretation.

Unfortunately, America loves basing its insults either in male genitalia or in demeaning references to women, and this insult is no different- "douche" is most typically used in American English as a specific reference to devices used for vaginal douching, and the foundation of the insult is based in that more general use of the term. In other words, the insult seems to be used to indicate that the other party should go clean their female anatomy instead of pretending to be a man [thus perhaps being a milder way of calling someone a "dirty cunt" or "faggot"].
Given the region where the term originated and chronological placement of its origination, this last meaning would seem likeliest to match to the basis for the insult's formation and to its intended implication

1766, "jet of water," from French douche (16c.), from Italian doccia "shower," from docciare "to spray," [..]
Meaning of "vaginal cleansing" is from 1833. The verb is first attested 1838.
Also: douche-bag, douche bag, 1893, from douche + bag (n.)
American English slang sense of "contemptible person" attested by 1967.
https://www.etymonline.com/

This is especially supported by the fact that when the term was originally used (in the 60s) it was used only against women, or against men who "behaved like women". It wasn't applied more generally until the 80s. In that vein, journals of the time noted the gender influence:

The journal American Speech defined douchebag in 1967 as “an unattractive coed,” or, “by extension, any individual whom the speaker desires to denigrate.”

Mild as that definition seems, the other references I found indicate that the more general application of the insult at the time seems to have been comparable to "bitch" or "faggot".

In summary, as with most distinct terms dedicated to the purpose of insult, the term really isn't at all funny once you realize the premise behind it. :/

I don't insult others.

But I like to say "yeah, you're so smart!". And observe how they get full of themselves. Yes.