Two great white sharks swimming in the ocean spied survivors of a sunken ship. “Follow me, son” the father shark said to the son shark and they swam to the mass of people.
“First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing.” And they did.
“Well done, son! Now we swim around them a few times with all of our fins showing.” And they did.
“Now we eat everybody.” And they did.
When they were both gorged, the son asked, “Dad, why didn't we just eat them all at first? Why did we swim around and around them?”
His wise father replied, “Because they taste better without the shit inside!”
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Why don’t we see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re really good at it.
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To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you.
You have my word.
This type of jokes are always better said than written though^^
https://youtu.be/ZbE_QioKvxU?t=146
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Thanks 💙 I really like dad jokes, if I could recommend you one short video for more, it would be this one below^^
https://youtu.be/CChF_Y1NSl8
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Two carrots are flying through the clear blue sky on a sunny day.
Suddenly one of them gets agitated and shouts - "Watch out for the cho..cho..chopper"
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A man enters a pub and asks for a beer. And then pays by placing a coin at each end of the very looong bar counter.
The waiter thinks it's super annoying but says nothing and fetches the coin faaar to the left and then faaaar to the right.
The guy drinks the beer and leaves.
Next day the guy comes back and starts the same mess, one coin far to the left one far to the right.
The waiter says nothing and fetches the coins far at the edges.
Next day the guy comes back and orders a beer but this time he pulls out a bank note.
The triumphant waiter prepares the change and places a coin far to the left and another far to the right of the counter.
And then the man gets another coin out of his pocket and says : "Another beer please."
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Heh, I want to watch someone try this once. Added.
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Haha, if only. Jim Carrey as the riddler was my childhood. Added.
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Not a joke, but a really funny video about Elden Ring 😆
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Ha, lots of potential for gifs there. Ah, added anyway.
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What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
♫ HAND EEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ♫
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Sports ballad of the year goes to Whitney Houston! Again!
Lol, added.
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I sold my roomba the other day, all it did was collect dust.
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But the pets can ride them while it collects dust!
Haha, added.
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My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote Linkin Park too much
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter
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Good one. I miss the times in middle school when I listened to them.
Thanks for the memories. Added
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I've been working from home a lot lately. When I was in the office, my coworkers used to laugh at my jokes. Now, on Zoom calls, I just get silence. Turns out my jokes aren't remotely funny.
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I remember this one from the first time I player WoW:
-What did the fly say after hitting a water barrage?
-Dam!
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Wow, that must have been a long time ago. I chuckled. Added.
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This was before my time but I enjoyed the video. Added.
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How did the frog burn his tongue? It tried to eat a firefly
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If you have 100$ in one pocket of your trousers, and 50 in the other, what does this mean?
That means I'm wearing someone else's trousers.
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A man travels to Spain and goes to a restaurant near the bull arena for a late dinner. He orders the house special and he is brought a plate with potatoes, corn, and two large meaty objects. "What's this?" he asks?
"The Matador Special, Senor," the waiter replies.
"What meat is it?" the man asks.
"Cojones," the waiter explains, "They, are the testicles of the bull who lost at the arena this afternoon."
At first the man is disgusted; but being the adventurous type, he decides to try this local delicacy. To his amazement, it is quite delicious. In fact, it is so good that he decides to come back again the next night and order it again. This time, the waiter brings out the plate, but the meaty objects are much smaller.
"What's this?" he asks the waiter.
"The Matador Special, senor," the waiter replies.
"No, no," the man objects, "I had the Matador Special yesterday and it was much bigger than this."
"Senor," the waiter explains, "the bull does not always lose."
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Funny! Added.
Also, what was the image? It doesn't want to load properly or improperly.
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Hello, it's been a while since I actively used this site so my whitelist might be mostly inactive. Trying to find some good people who are still active here. So share away and we can add each other as we laugh. Also, I probably won't add anyone who hasn't given away at least a couple of games before.
My joke: Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you’ll be a mile away and you’ll have their shoes.
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