My dad passed on.

Life is death, and death is life.

Since losing my brother and absolute best friend, I've realized there are two types of people: those who have lost someone close, and those who haven't. It definitely changes you. At this moment, there's going to be nothing but pain-- so just let yourself feel it. Let your emotions run over you, experience them as they come. Time will eventually dull the sting and allow you to focus on how precious your own life is. My little brother's absence teaches me how to live better each and every day.

It really sucks to be on the other side of it, but this is truly part of the human experience we all share. It makes you think about just how many people in your daily life have experienced what you are feeling now-- we're all a part of the same team.

I am truly sorry for your loss.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4dXrV4FtjE

I've been in a similar situation many times. It's human nature to not feel much this early on. Read about the stages of grief. What you're experiencing is normal and part of the human experience. Almost everyone has to go through the same thing at one point or another. Life sucks sometimes. Sorry for your loss OP.

My father passed on some years ago. It was a very difficult time for me. We had been at odds for a long time and then reconciled. I found his illness upsetting and didn't handle it as well as I should have. There was a lot of family drama. I felt a lot of different things but I didn't really feel the things that I felt I should if that even makes sense. Nothing had prepared me what was going on and I didn't know what to do or where to turn. I processed things in time and eventually I found peace and was able to think of the good memories I had and smile rather than the bad times. This is sadly a part of life that every day many people have to find their way through. I can only say that it will get better.

I'm not sure what to say as nothing said in a time of emotional trauma is ever "correct." I will let you know that people empathize and can relate to that "empty" void feeling. Having miraculously pulled out of that pit of despair myself and doing my damnedest to lend a helping hand to others in similar pits: I want you to know that it's entirely acceptable to feel nothing. Emotion is illogical to begin with, so a lack thereof "must" be logical. You're in a state of unease and in need of solace in a situation with no resolution other than emptiness and it can be rough. Feeling nothing is easier than feeling anything at all, but you're going to have to make a decision on how you move forward. Are you going to let this event in your life be the end of something great or the start of something potentially greater? I don't know you or your father, I don't know the relationship you may or may not have had, but I do know that you're still here and you have much more to do if you so choose to do it.

condolences.

My condolences

Damn steam disconnect man :/

I recognise those feelings, having lost my father almost a year ago. It's basically a form of depression. They fade over time, slowly. I don't think they'll ever completely disappear though. And it's weird to adjust to what basically feels like a new reality.
The one thing my dad impressed on us though, was that we should keep on living, and keep doing the things we enjoy. I have to agree with him on that. I'm still here, I still have plenty of years ahead, and I don't plan to spend all that time staying all gloomy.

Anyway, enough about me.

My heartfelt condolences to you.

Death is weird, man. It's just so final, and it can happen at any time. As the ones left behind we try and make sense of it, try and accept it, try and move forward, but those things tend to be easier said than done. What you're doing right now, talking about it, is probably a good idea. Having people to listen and empathize can help to sort things out. If I have any advice to give you, it's just to take things one day at a time. You'll have some days better than others, but you'll get through it a little bit at a time.

I hope something I said helps. Hang in there man.

I'm sorry for your loss. My father passed away earlier this year, so I can understand some of what you're going through.

Don't you think your father would want you to finish college, rather than quitting and running away?

My condolences.

I feel you.

My mother is fighting cancer and it's not looking good.

Sorry you have to go through that. It's normal to not know how to feel and act. Don't beat yourself about not crying, it will probably come to surface randomly when you read about a character in a book or see something completely random in the movie. Happens to a lot of people.

My sincere condolences to you and your family. In such moments it's always difficult to find the right words. I wish you strength to overcome this difficult time, and I hope you can do this, perhaps with the help of people close to you.

Death's an odd one. We as humans are prepared for anything with the people we love other than their death. I mean, we know it exists, we might even prepare ourselves for it, but when it comes it still catches us off-guard.
I think people don't really "die". I mean, they might die physically, but that's about it. What's the difference between a certain celebrity being alive vs being dead. What they did still lives on and people remember them. Same goes with your father. He has influenced you in some way and that won't go away because that influence influenced someone else and so on and so forth. The things he did will be in your memories, in the memories of others as well.

So, your father might be dead, but he's not "gone" exactly. He's still there, apart of you, whether you like it or not.
I'm sorry for your loss. Take time for yourself, vent if you want to and do whatever else you feel you need to do. Grief, like any emotion will fade over time. Hopefully it'll be there the appropriate amount.

I had to go through this with two of my sister's children after she passed away a few years back, and here's (kinda) what I said to them.

It doesn't matter what we did or didn't say. It doesn't matter what we did or why we did it. What matters now is what we do and the choices we make as we go forward in life, and living a good long healthy life like [their mom/my sister/your father] would want us to live. It's okay to weep for them, but know that they'd want us smiling, succeeding, and happy. So let's do that when we're ready, and always remember them and love them.

Whatever you do , don't quit college... Learn soms skill to earn , get involve in some activities and one final advice listen to music a lot . P.S. don't think to hard on dating girl or rejection rather try to imporve yourself.

I am sorry for your loss. He is in a better place right now, but his memory and his deeds are still here! I have to hope that life has its ups and downs for everyone. I have to hope, that the bad only happens so it can be a contrast to the good sometime later. I wish you strength, you will get through this!

Fuck. I feel bad for you. Losing a loved one always sucks.

Sorry for your loss. Losing people which are close to you is a strange experience, but it is part of being human. And do not worry about what you should feel, people do respond in different ways to such losses, and even the same person feels differently as time passes. The important thing is to make sure you express your love for your loved ones which are still around, and that you remain a decent human being for everybody else (also through your feelings, but most importantly, through your actions).

(I also lost my father -- about 25 years ago. We were not close, but I did not hate him either... He was not nice and loving, but he was not a criminal either... As far as I could tell, he was just this person that wasn't really into "family". So we were just distant, and that is what made his death feel really strange to me, since there was no reference point about "what I should feel"... Back then, when I told my close friends that he had just died, they seemed to be more affected than I was, it was a bit awkward... Not sure how much of this relates to your situation, but I figured I would share, in case it helps.)

That said, it is natural that you will mull things over, think about the past, worry about the present, and even fear the future. It is natural to lose sleep for a while -- but it is also ok if you manage to sleep well soon, it is important for your health. I am not very wise, but if I could offer any advice, I would say, try not to make any radical decisions until you regain your balance. But again, it is your life, and most likely you are the person that knows best what is best for you.

All the best!

I feel you. My mother survived cancer last year and my father is moving to rehab next week, after another seizure kept him away from us for 2 months now. Its just a matter of time at this point, yet I doubt that anything will really prepare me for that day.
My condolences.

My condolences to you and your family.

View attached image.

My condolences. I just lost my 100 y/o great grandmother that was a second mother to me this month. I've lost so many people over the years that I can empathize with being void(even just in general life)...even though that sounds a bit paradoxical. Since you still have fear and the instinct to run and see things as scary(something I understand all too well) that tells me that tells me you're not void. But this is deeper than that, I get it, I'm in the same place in many many ways. Please just don't run, I've run and isolated myself for basically a decade and I regret so much. It WILL get debilitating if you give up or find your comfort zone. You're in college, so is my cousin who's been trying to get me to enroll and I envy you both so much, I've got a dead end job that does have some meaning to it...but I know I'm going nowhere and I'm too afraid to try. I'm going to be scrounging for the rest of my life if I don't make a drastic change. I know it's not that simple either, it will take immeasurable effort. You have to force yourself. You say you have no regrets but before that you say how you wish things had been better between you guys and you allude to feelings of self-doubt, anxiety, depressive symptoms. I think there's more to who you are and what's going on with you than you might see. You say "im afraid, lost, and im rethinking every action i ever did." Please don't get stuck in your own head. What is done is done. Getting stuck in the past is not a healthy or fun place to be, you need to pick a goal and strive towards it. Forget about everything that's happend, you owe no one anything. Find your passion, pursue it, continue college even if it's just for the diploma and you find another passion, there's always a way with hard work. Live for you this restart.