I found mine on Twitter - where one says things one would usually say in many words and puts it into only a hundred or so characters.
Pretty much like the opposite of what I did with this thread!
Not going to give you advice, anything I say would basically be overgeneralised clichés or personal experience/nostalgia wrapped up in paper with clowns on it and handed to you like I bought you a new gift even though I just gave you my shit experiences.
Comment has been collapsed.
Well, good for you mate! The ending was a bit awkward to read, BUT! then I realised I'm exactly like that most of the time, so... :D It's 2:30AM here, so have a nice sloth, and good night SG!
Comment has been collapsed.
TLDR
The Bridge:https://www.humblebundle.com/gift?key=BkNutb[]H2DMdpnBs
[]=Numbr of valence electrons in an atom of Boron.
Comment has been collapsed.
Whoever took it was too greedy to say thanks, so thanks!
[EDIT] Whoops. Nevermind.
Comment has been collapsed.
It could get worse, I could mention the post-divorce existential crisis that leads to you buying a banged up sports car in which to catch an STD from a university age woman you met in a bar, during the investigation of which, abnormalities of the prostate are found, leading to debilitating cancer treatment and an inevitable decline into senescence and eventually undignified death.
But that isn't anywhere near as funny.
Comment has been collapsed.
15 years of age, working on my first girlfriend one of these days :P
Comment has been collapsed.
I dunno why but a lot of old men seem attracted to me.
All those promises ...
I'M STILL WAITING FOR MY TRIP AROUND THE WORLD GODDAMMIT
But I guess that's the curse I have to live with, by being so beautiful and irresistible. Thank fucking god I'm humble.
Comment has been collapsed.
Go find a flat. Find somebody else. Put them in the flat. Make them stay. Get a toaster. Go to work. Look at your boss. Say, 'fuck'. Sit down. Pick up the thing. Go blank. Scream internally. Go home. Listen to the radio. Look at the other person. Think, 'Why, why did this happen?' Go to bed. Lie awake at night. Get up. Feel groggy. Put the things on - your clothes - whatever they're called. Go out the door, into work - same thing. Same people, again, it's real, it is happening, to you. Go home again. Sit, radio, dinner - mmm - gardening, gardening, gardening, death.
Yeah, some things just come naturally.
Comment has been collapsed.
50 Comments - Last post 9 minutes ago by duville
475 Comments - Last post 13 minutes ago by PaganFears
98 Comments - Last post 26 minutes ago by Conti
258 Comments - Last post 1 hour ago by schattencheg
2,114 Comments - Last post 2 hours ago by MeguminShiro
1,444 Comments - Last post 6 hours ago by PicoMan
6 Comments - Last post 6 hours ago by FranckCastle
7,140 Comments - Last post 5 minutes ago by Boson
7,965 Comments - Last post 7 minutes ago by Boson
103 Comments - Last post 17 minutes ago by Microfish
22 Comments - Last post 19 minutes ago by DeliberateTaco
91 Comments - Last post 34 minutes ago by drstem
244 Comments - Last post 34 minutes ago by Funziunzi
15 Comments - Last post 54 minutes ago by DeltaBladeX
We met online and started talking. At first it was mainly political discussion, 'these people are too rich', 'these people are too deprived', 'I'd like to punch David Cameron in his stupid smug fucking face!' - The usual sort of thing.
Then we started talking about ourselves. Turns out we had a lot in common. Good things that we could share our joy in, and bad things that we could help each other through.
As we got chatting online more we decided it was about time to meet up. By now it was quite obvious that there was a relationship agenda going on, so I pre-warned her that in me she would find a guy who looks like fat, sexy Jesus and if she couldn't handle a holy chubster she was welcome to let me know and we could just be friends. As it was, she thought me rather handsome and God damn if she wasn't the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, let alone been anywhere near a relationship with.
We've been together for approaching two years now and all seems to be going strong. So I don't really need any advice at all.
I didn't play it cool. I can't, I suffer from GAD - that's general anxiety disorder. It means that when I get nervous I turn into jelly that dribbles.
Either I'm very lucky, or you should just live your life and not give these things too much thought. I don't think I've ever officially 'asked someone out' in my life - How does it end up this huge deal for some people? You just meet people, like people, try to have sexy times with people, get rejected, cry while you masturbate, find someone else and repeat until someone happens to like YOU enough to stay with you.
Then of course you change over time and people grow apart, and then you've got the kids to think about but it's just too unbearable so you inevitably divorce anyway, and she talks about you like you're the piece of shit clinging to that last anal hair and you talk about her like she bit your glans every time she sucked you off and the kids grow up jaded and have to ask on fucking game gift distribution forums how to approach dealing with women...
Also, late 90s TV presenter has a giveaway link [EXPIRED!]
httpcolonforwardslashforwardslashwwwdotsteamgiftsdotcomforwardslashgiveawayforwardslashO44rgforwardslashdefygravityextended
Comment has been collapsed.