Female Steamgifters - I need your help

I really like what GRR Martin says about this:

View attached image.

These questions are.. stupid.
Females, like men, are just as complex and variable. What someone wants, and likes, varies a lot based on age, background, and future dreams.

As a writer, you need to build your character up from the ground up. Was her parents happily married? Has she been hurt before? How old is she? Does she want commitment? Is she a "strong independant woman" who don't need to be treated like a girl? Or has she always been strong and alone and wishes for someone to finally treat her like a girl? protect her? take care of her? etc.

All of your questions are highly biased,
"How would you describe romance from a female perspective?" I've met more males than females who are wishy washy romantics, as most works of art portray the female view of romance.

I don't know, it irks me when I think that someone might be out there thinking "ah, there is one mold that fits them all". But I'm guessing you might be asking these questions for inspiration for characters and not just answers about the inside of an female mind alone. So I'll answer my own. Tho I don't think it'll be very helpfull.

What are common qualities that girls/women are attracted to in men?
Personally, I've always gone weak in the knees for "bad boys", independant strong characters that wasn't afraid to stand up against people. (This is based in my childhood where due to certain circumstances people would go "eww you're playing with Sarah?" (Sarah's not my name, but hey that doesn't matter). And there was always that one or two boys who'd stand up and go "yeah? so what?". But I always, and utterly, fell madly inlove with the funny guy. The guy that made me laugh.

How do girls think about guys that they like/are attracted to/are dating?
How do you think about the girl you like? You admire them, you ignore their flaws, you make excuses for them, and think about them, look forward to seeing them, etc, etc.

What physical features do girls notice the most on a guy?
This is very different to person to person. My father was an outside kinda person, a true workaholic that always tinkering on cars, building shit, and working outside. In the end he got a tan so strong that if you ignored his facial features you wouldn't think he was "white". Thus, I grew a likeage to tanned, or brown, men. To the point that stark white men would almost look ugly naked to me.

How would you describe romance from a female perspective?
Again, very different from person to person.
I'm in a serious relationship, I've been with my significant other for soon 9 years now. And I.. never consider myself a romantic person, romance makes me uncomfortable. But in the end, it's the little things that warms my heart. It isn't the grand gestures or the expensive gifts. It's the fact that'll he make me breakfast. It's the fact when we sit here and game, he'll move his ass to get me a drink instead of insisting I get my own. It's the fact that if I'm not feeling well, and I just want to go lay in bed. He'll join me, he'll watch a twitch stream or play mobile games or read manga on the ipad while I read a book.

We live in a society where females are grown up with the image that the men is supposed to cater them, men is supposed to do the romantic act, and take care of them. Be the big spoon. And a lot of girls expect that. Demand it even. In my life I've had a friend or two, straight males, who wanted to be the submissive in the relationship. They wanted to be wooed and swept of their feet by a girl, and not the other way around. I like that, a modern relationship where things can go both ways.

But personally, romance is in the little everyday things that a couple do for eachother to make life just a little simpler.
I'll always love my Sebastian, just because he makes my life easier and not harder.
And THAT, is hard to find.

I read a lot of shoujo manga (comics for young girls - almost all involves romance), if you're looking for a sweeping stereotype found in what I read then I'll narrow it down for you -- it's bit of a generalisation but they are usually young, either normal or quiet awkward female protagonists who falls madly in love with the popular guys who are super nice/ bad.

Usually female vs male characters have opposite personalities to create drama, though not always the case. If they have similar agreeable personalities then there's usually some form of misunderstanding or miscommunication between them.

Common physical features they notices in guys are their long eye lashes, eye color, broad shoulders (from the back view), height, even smell (like cologne?).

They are constantly thinking about them, so much that their heart aches. Otherwise they feel depressed and envious when they see the guy close to another girl (not in a malicious way). They admire them from a distant (if they don't know them), or if they are friend's with them they just act like a normal friend (tomboy usually).

Most girls love romance, otherwise their wouldn't be piles of romance manga, romcom movies, novels, or girls just gossiping about guys with their friends.

But like all initial romances, the guys' qualities are exaggerated, you idealise them, and can't see any faults in them - you see everything in rose-coloured glasses.

Not a female here but I think if you write anything with mid teens you have to look at what they all are about at that age group. Also look at the maturity level. Most younger females, likewise for male, would be more into the physical attraction and trying to have fun. As you grow older, you have had your fun, dated around or so, have met more people, are making money, I think your priority are different. Physical attraction may not be the number one thing you look at or just having fun. I think with comments from the female users here and addressing the maturity level of your characters will help you give them a better personality and how they like different people.

maybe you should read a Book about, how to attract women. thats you answer :)

What are common qualities that girls/women are attracted to in men?

Rich, successful, handsome, above-average manhood, has abs, smart, charming, and literally being a prince. At least 3 out of all these.

How do girls think about guys that they like/are attracted to/are dating?

"Can this guy provide for me and all the superficial things I want to buy? Also, is he able to ravish me and leave me above and beyond satisfied? If I tell him to like all my Facebook posts and be my loyal servant, how much willingness can I expect from him?"

What physical features do girls notice the most on a guy?

Muscular biceps, bulging pecs, at least a six-pack, height, dreamy eyes, perfect teeth, flawless skin, suave hair, and the car he drives.

How would you describe romance from a female perspective?

If the guy is willing to bendover backwards at the slightest demand, he's the one. And if he checks all items on a Cosmo article titled "31 Reasons Why He's Mister Right"

The quest to understand women...
I wish you the best of luck!

I also need the help of female SG users ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) giggidy all help is wellcummed.
Yeah a lot of people have said already but my take is pretty much make up a character before even assigning a gender since people are so complex then you can assign a gender after you establish main traits, I'm sorry but I can't help with behaviours or mannerisms that kinda stuff or
what women want for romance in my experience tho younger women prefer more confidence and style after a point it cuts off and generally women look for something of substance. Sorry if none of this was helpful

Idk if this will help much but I'm a sucker for musicians. For example when I was younger I had a huge crush on the singer from The Script. I like a guy with a cute voice who knows how to sing which is why I got attracted to him.

I'm a man, but also like to write and draw short stories and comics. (in spanish, so forgive my english)

As a writer I recommend this: read. You have to read lots of good books written by women. Their sensibilities are different, and you'll have a better perspective. Another good source are movies and graphic novels. You'll be amazed, and you'll learn a lot.

Do your own research on the topics and the arguments that are interesting to you. If you like, I can point you a couple of authors.

Have fun!

Hey Phoenix:)

I hope I can help - not only as a woman that enjoys romance, but because this topic is how I make a living ^_^.
I'm a dating coach, and my passion has always been men and women relationships, how they interact, their big differences, etc. I've been researching, experimenting, reading, and talking about it for 6 years, since I was 16, and then later on teaching it.

I'm not a know-it-all, but hopefully you can find something that helps, in my ramble ^_^

What are common qualities that girls/women are attracted to in men?

That's the weird thing about attraction, with women. Women tend to think with their brains, but act with their hearts. Most of us don't realize that we do that, either. Especially as teens.

Why do you think men can't understand women? The main answer would be that most men think logically, while most women think emotionally... so that creates a weird rift and a lot of men don't know how to handle it. However, another answer is that most women are not aware that they do that, so if they can't understand themselves, how would someone else understand them?

Women can tell you a big list of what they are attracted to, and what they look in a partner. Kindness. Personality. Common hobbies. Specific looks. Humor. Artists. Best friend. However, that list is logical. But they won't react to attraction from logical impulses. So yes, we think we know what we want in a man, and we kind of do... of course those traits that we prefer will help a man, but at the end of the day, attraction is an emotional trigger, and that 'list' can all be forgotten if a guy teases us a certain way, or says something super confidently, or does anything that really woos us, or a gamer guy that's just strangely fun to be around.

That's why you'll see a girl attracted to a guy, but be torn inside her. "Why do I like him so much?" "I can't understand it!" "Is this right?!"

That's why you'll also see a girl tell everyone she's not ready for a relationship this year, that she's too busy. (That's her logical side talking). And then BAM two days later she's dating a guy. (Buuut the emotional side won). Or people that see who she picked and think "what does she see in that guy?".

Granted, that opens the door to broken hearts, to disappointment, to sadness - but it is what it is.

The younger a woman is (or should I say, the less emotionally mature she is), the more this whole thing is just one big anguishing puzzle for her.

So just to wrap it up cause I tend to ramble on: Attraction, in a woman, is a fight between her logical side, and her emotional side. We think we are logical, but we respond emotionally. Obviously there are exceptions.

How do girls think about guys that they like/are attracted to/are dating?

They tend to think of specific little things. A specific compliment the guy told her will stay in her mind for a long time. A specific moment when their hands touched and he looked into her eyes.
A specific thing he said. Women are really good at re-creating scenes in their minds.

That's why I tell guys that when they give a compliment, the #1 rule is to be VERY specific. "You're pretty' is just whatever, she won't remember it. "I like how your lips curl up when you smile, it looks like a half smirk, but it's so attractive". THAT ONE she will remember forever. Until you piss her off, anyway, then she forgets everything nice you did for her (;.

I'm not sure I understood the question, so I guess I only answered a tiny and specific part of it, but yeah (;

What physical features do girls notice the most on a guy?

I would say the smile. For sure. For me anyway, I love a guy's smile <3

But really physical features aren't too important for us. Smile, and maybe eyes, I guess.

How would you describe romance from a female perspective?

Romance. From my perspective, I would say romance is like an ocean? Romance is when I trust a guy enough to pour my feelings into him. To let down my guards, and let my feelings flow like waves, not knowing where it will take me. There will be highs, there will be lows. But deep down, I will feel warm, and ALIVE.
My emotions will lead me, but my emotions are unpredictable, like an ocean. The man... I hope the man will be my ship, a strong ship, able to sail through my ocean of feelings, and able to keep straight, to sail strong, even though sometimes I might make it rain on him, hard ;x

...But really, human beings are so complex, you can't really know all the answers. We're all so unique, different, in our passions, likes, dislikes, personalities. Two people romancing each other are just taking a leap of faith and hoping for the best:)

Well, good luck in your art <3

Im probably one of the last females to ask about romance. Cant stomach it most of the time.

But I write as well, so best advice I can give you is to keep it as natural as possible. As in, dont force two characters just for the sake of pairing them together (absolutely hate when authors do that. Almost always feels like cheap fanfic). Flesh out your characters as actual characters first to make sure they have chemistry so it reads smoothly and naturally when you do pair them together.

The first question that comes to me is: why don't you write from a perspective you feel comfortable with - that is: a male one? There is a ton of stuff written from a female perspective. I - as a woman - would often be interested in stuff written from a convincing male perspective!

But still: If you ask me what might attract me to a man, there are a couple of things that come to mind:

• I am interested in eyes in more than one way. On the one hand, beautiful eyes are attractive to me per se. It doesn't matter what color they are, just beautiful eyes. On the other hand, I can only check eyes if a guy looks me in the eyes which includes two things: not checking out my other body parts most of the time (it's nice if they are noticed in due time, but not when meeting for the first time and not for most of the time), and being open enough to be able to keep eye contact for more than a second.
• I do not want to be acknowledged as body only. I have a brain and quite some ability to use it, so I like being asked for my opinion and, where appropriate, for my advice, and I like it if I feel that my opinion is considered (that doesn't mean agreeing all the time, but giving my opinion credit).
• Perfect men are plain boring, and that doesn't only apply if they are just so full of themselves not to realize that they aren't, but also if they are perfect. I'm not perfect, and I don't want to compete with a perfect man all the time.
• Imperfections I don't take easy are not being considerate and bad hygene, but small flaws are welcome, especially small flaws in looks.
• Being strong all the time doesn't appeal to me, neither if I have to do so nor if a man does. So admitting weaknesses is actually an appealing trait of a man, of course the weaknesses shouldn't be too dominant and should be balanced by strengths and resources.

Hey, I wanna answer, though it might be written in the previous answer. My answer gonna be TL;DR version, so you can fantasize more :p

What are common qualities that girls/women are attracted to in men?

Having a good soul, and compatible with your female character (it might be something like yin-yang)

How do girls think about guys that they like/are attracted to/are dating?

Like "are he taking care of himself?" (because I'm a worry wart)

What physical features do girls notice the most on a guy?

Nothing about this question will lead to general answer. it depends.
I'm not into physical features. But, fit is important so yeah.

How would you describe romance from a female perspective?

When you caring your other half so much. I think this won't be general answer too, since I'm very simple person ._.

This thread is gold, I've learned a lot through the answers here. Thanks everyone for sharing.

Bags,,women like bags and maybe shoes depends on your wallet..which I doubt yours is big..jokin ofc.Just dont be a complete asshole be the same relaxed person you are with your friends and u be fine..no swears no spitting no whore words and u just be good.

We're all just human on the inside. Focus too much on writing what you think a female should be like and it'll end up coming off forced and corny. Males and females often act very different outwardly, but that's mainly just habits we form to make fitting into society easier. Those differences apply far less when it comes to how we process things on the inside.

For each of those questions you need to ask what type of PERSON you're writing about, not which gender.

As an example, a highly sexual person might focus on someone's ass first, regardless of gender.
A less sexual person might focus on eyes first instead.
Yet another might not focus on physicality but rather scent - something that is very important to a lot of people.

Think of what type of character traits you want your character to have. Sanguine or melancholic? Highly sexual or conservative? Idealist or cynical? Introvert or extrovert? Thinking like that will in my opinion make for far more interesting, believable (and probably easier to write) characters.