Back from the dead

Oh, you're in for it now... Here is a taste of my twitter feed (I stumbled into joke twitter and have made a nice little home for myself there)

Why do you carry coins in your hat?
That's where your head quarters are.

Why do you carry coins in your back pocket?
That’s where your hind quarters are.

If you are sad while crushing cans of carbonated beverages you are soda pressed.

How does Santa know if you've been naughty or nice?
Because he's stocking you!

What do you call the woman who runs a Martian turkey farm?
Anne of green Gobbles

When a bachelor kisses someone it is always with un-bridaled passion.

These are just the lame ones I have come up with. There are many people far funnier than me who I follow too.

Thanks so much <3 ^_^

When I refresh myself on the markdown text I'll reply with images and gifs more often because that's way better than typing out all these lame words. (it's so much easier that twitter does it for you automatically, lol)

This. Exactly this. You must be a parent too because this is so extremely true.

I prefer a good Malbec ;)

Haven't "seen" you around here much in quite some time. I hope you're doing well, or as well as possible nowadays.
Have a nice weekend. :-)

Haha, funny you say it that way. I actually was getting ready to get back on SG about 2 years ago but then the little one came along. I have missed it here. Not sure if my 4 year old keys would still work so I will be making a thread to just give the keys away just in case because I don't want to get in trouble for making a giveaway with a key that won't work!

Yeah. It's true that you start forgetting a lot of the details once they start getting older and you can sleep normally again.

Lol, thanks. I seem to be getting the hang of it finally.