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no need to thank unless you win - tell a joke instead
best jokes get whitelisted of course
Joke: promises to whitelist, has not done a single WL GA, ever. Hope that qualifies!
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true - only have 10 peeps on whitelist so I wouldn't get 5 entries i guess... therefore i look for funny nice ppl...
well said but not funny though... you may try again^^
Crookz - The Big Heist
game director - Hillary C.
Mother: “How was school today, Patrick?”
Patrick: “It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!”
Mother: ”Ohh...And what will you do at school tomorrow?”
Patrick: “What school?”
Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, “Wow, that’s got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site.”
Teacher: "Kids, what does the fluffy chicken give you?"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pink pig give you?"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
I threw a boomerang like 6 years ago and it never came back.
Now I live in constant fear. ;)
i feel with ya^^
Fair warning, all my jokes are intentionally bad.
Like...what do you call a pier that is both there and not there?
a pair o' docks.
I eat glass
Me: Knock Knock.
You: Who's there?
Me: Thank you.
You: Thank you who?
Me: INVALID PARAMETER, BOT SCRIPT REBOOT INITIATED
Sorry, I'm pretty terrible at making jokey jokes. :p
A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money so i woke up and searched with him...
Any resemblance to recent sales is purely coincidental
xD ... i hope he was greatful
It is a man who goes into a bar and he says "it's me" when in fact it was not him.
A man walks into a bar with a giraffe.
They each get pissed.
The giraffe falls over.
The man goes to leave and the barman says, "Oi. You can't leave that lyin' there."
The man says, "No. It's not a lion. It's a giraffe."
I just watched 28 Days Later, again.
i think i shoulda watch that movie ^^
I'm planning on also watching 28 Weeks Later later.
I am going to watch it, but I mostly just wanted to type later twice in a row.
A physics professor and his assistant are working on liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ions, when all of a sudden, the assistant says, "Wait, professor, what if the salicylic acids do not accept the hydroxyl ions?" And the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion; that's my wife!"
One day, I'd really like to work as a mirror cleaner. It's a job I could see myself doing! ;D
thats a nice self reflecting one ^^
Mike was afraid of flying. For 40 years he avoided it, going so far as to book his vacations with his wife on cruises so if he had to go overseas, he could take a long sea voyage and get the job done then sail home.
Unfortunately there came a crisis in the company that he was now a leading figure in and he was forced to book a flight from New York to Sydney. He fretted all night, took 3 times the recommended dosage of tranquillisers and was still nervous.
He boarded the flight and took his seat.
Take off was a little bumpy but he got through it without screaming too much and settled down once it started to smooth out.
After about 10 minutes he actually looked out the windows and was mesmerised by the scenery.
After 20 minutes, the loud speaker came on.
"Good morning ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to flight 117 Non stop New York to Sydney, Flight time approximately 23 hours. From weather scans it looks like it's going to be a perfect flight, with nothing in our way for the entire trip, we'll be cruising at about 42,000 feet and AARARGGGHGHGHRGHGHGH!!!!!!!"
The Plane lurched violently to the left, nose-dived then slowly straightened out and resumed a steady course.
Mike was petrified. He had turned a distinct shade of green and was holding rigidly to his seat.
After a few moments the pilot resumed speaking.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to apologise for that, you see a stewardess had just brought my coffee in and tripped over the door frame. The coffee went flying, and well... you should see the front of my pants."
Mike screamed out, "Fuck the front of your pants - You should see the back of mine!"
i <3 it ^^
Here Is one I made up last week. However I cant imagine that someone else hasn't had the same Idea. Maybe not so funny, but you know your gong to use it on someone.
Nobody there to answer. :)
Two zombies are eating a clown when one looks up and says "Does this taste funny to you ?"
Yes, we need sexy revelaing armor for boys! :D
Hehe. x) Well, after that I googled "sexy man armor" and "Oh wow", suppose, the world isn't ready for this hot sexuality.
Be careful opening the next image, it will be hard to unsee:
Looks about right to me... :D :D
you are awesome!
:З Oh stop it, you!
Thank you :)
Thank you for this, it's very much appreciated
Joke? Err...............A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, Pardner! Why the long face?"
I won what looks to be a most excellent game. Thank you very much! P.S. some very good jokes here.