Quite cheeky title, there are a lot of gibs here :> Gibs can wait, first I want to tell you that soon enough, I'll be forced to leave my home and spend 365 days on a military base. Yes, it's compulsory military service, which is mandatory here in Russia. You must go through this if you're male, you're 18 years old or older, you're Russian and you're healthy dude. I meet the requirements. You can actually avoid this service by finding some heavy diseases or disorders in your body and sanity, or bribing, or simply hiding for ten years (which is stupid). I'm a healthy dude and not that rich to bribe someone so I decided to meet my fate.

Kind of sad to leave this community for a year, I won't have access to internet for 365 days - frightening, isn't it? That's not quite true because eventually cheeky guys will find a way to get a smartphone and hide it from authority :D I'm thinking of buying annual sub for HB Monthly. Imagine, you're coming back with twelve Humble Monthlies in your sofa pocket. ^^ That'd be awesome!

very intrigued on where eventually will I be serving. Until very last moment you don't know where you're going, everything is kept in secret. It can be either Kaliningrad (former Konigsberg) which is near Germany or Vladivostok, which is near Japan. It's 7,247.32 km (4,503.28 mi) between these two cities. Or Moscow. Or in the middle of nowhere Syberia. Or ice cold northern area. Or boiling hot Caucasus lands. Russia is HUGE.

4 Cakeday I prepared some obligatory giveaways, nothing of interest, just Jetdogs bundle without HOGs. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

No, there's no Styx: Master of Shadows secret giveaway hidden in this post, don't even search for it. Save your time. Trust me. You don't even have to use zelgh magic guide, what a relief. Also, tribute to SG Attrition.

5 years ago

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Happy cake day!

Focus in finding the positive side of everything that happen in your live. Practically every situation in our live has something that makes us stronger.

Good luck and
You are in the army, now!

5 years ago
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Happy cakeday! And good luck in your service.

Though I want to point out to anyone who doesn't know how mandatory military service works in Russia that this depiction isn't entirely accurate. There are a great many ways to avoid, or at least postpone, the military service if that's not your thing, so everything is not all that grim.

  • The most straightforward way is, be involved in the academia. If you are a university student, you aren't enlisted. And one can be a student for quite a long time, going through the Bachelor's, Master's degrees, various doctorates... Though if you drop out at some point, even if you re-apply, you'll be enlisted anyway.
  • If you're a gay person, you aren't enlisted.
  • If you state that you're a pacifist and refuse to go through military training, you'll be assigned alternative, civic duty, which is essentially just paid work, but done for the military.
  • You can, being perfectly healthy, still have--what's the word for it in English?--these chaotically located things that are dark red/brown blobs of flesh protruding out of your body in places that prevent you from wearing a uniform without risking damaging these things.
  • You won't serve while you have small kids.
  • Many others that I don't know of.

It isn't meant as a personal offense or an accusation, but I thought that by your message one could get an entirely wrong vision of how this enlistment works. There is already a perception of Russia as some kind of tyrannical monarchy that will find contrived ways to do things to you in spite of your will, and if what you said was right and no life choices (aside bribery and hiding) could relieve you from going to army, which is obviously not everyone's thing, the image of the country as a dictatorship would only be strengthened. I'm sure you meant no ill at all when writing this and just wanted to explain the context, but in my opinion, the details you omitted are important.

5 years ago*
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idk, a mole maybe? :D
Also dont sweat the mandatory military service thing. A lot of countries have it, and its def not the reason the world looks so judgingly at Russia some times.:D

5 years ago
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Yeah, "mole" is the word for it.

You're right that the mandatory military service isn't necessarily a bad thing in itself. But the Russian military also has a very bad reputation for abuse of soldiers. Actually, it heavily depends on which military base you are dispatched to, and most military bases are quite normal, but there are at least some where actual murder happens, as well as rape, cleaning up toilets with one's toothbrush, and waking up the whole squad because the bed of one of them squeaked. Therefore, some people see the Russian military as a form of imprisonment with elements of torture. How much of this is relevant to your average Ivan remains open to discussion--for instance, none of the people I know who served have witnessed this sort of things--but if one believes that the Russian army is a death sentence and ALSO believes that it's an inevitable part of every guy's life, the picture is not pretty.

5 years ago
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Happy cake day!
Also stay safe and take care soldier! ;)

5 years ago
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Aaand - nope! Here in Russia you don't have any obligation to do that thing.
Instead of this every 18-26 y.o. dude (even before he'll know what governmnent thinks about his health conditions) have several choices:

  • to sit out atleast 1 year in enclosed institution (aka army),
  • to pay money penalty or go in jail,
  • to pay money for not going in jail/enclosed institution,
  • to be free using some official workarounds (get academic degree or serious trauma, etc.),
  • to DGAF and live in forest until you're 27,
  • and, finally, to go on AGS for 18-21 months (no, not for a work for PC-game pirates!).

AGS is an usual work in state сompany for healty citizens who know their rights. In most cases you just work normally 8 hours/day as postman/cleaner in your own region for real money - and that's all! Check out all the differences here.
So, which path is better? Everyone free to decide it by their own, but, please, no need to provide info about some thing that everyone must to do when you, for real, can not to do it at all!
Anyway, happy cakeday! Wish you a wise choice!

5 years ago
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Thanks for the giveaways, and good luck in the coming year!

5 years ago
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That sounds tough, thankfully my country no longer has mandatory service, if I have had to that back when I was 18 I would have taken any alternative.
Well anyway. Happy cakeday and thanks for the gibs :)

5 years ago
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Happy cake day!

5 years ago
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Happy Cakeday! :D

5 years ago
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Happy Cakeday :)

View attached image.
5 years ago
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You said no giveaways! 🤥 Damn you, sir! 😁
Good luck in the military!

5 years ago
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All the best and I hope your service will pass quickly and peacefully. Cheers for the gibs

5 years ago
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Happy Cake day! I cannot imagine going with the internet for 365 days. On the other hand, perhaps it will be liberating.
Hope you will end up in one of the spots you are hoping for and not too cold >< , good luck! :)

5 years ago
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Happy bump!

5 years ago
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May the cakeforce be with you:)

5 years ago
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Happy Cake Day. Good luck with everything. :)

5 years ago
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and many more years

5 years ago
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Happy cake day!

5 years ago
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Happy cakeday! And good luck in obligatory military service, gee, I hate the word obligatory.

5 years ago
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Happy cakeday :)

5 years ago
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Happy cakeday!)

View attached image.
5 years ago
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Happy cakeday =)

5 years ago
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Happy Cakeday!

5 years ago
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Happy cakeday and good luck with the military service!

5 years ago
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bump

5 years ago
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Happy 🎂day!

5 years ago
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