Torrential Spray

6:56 PM - Snusnu: So, I had this steady DJ gig a few years back

6:57 PM - Snusnu: I also had a co-worker who near lived me who was a raging alcoholic.

6:57 PM - Raiden: how his addiction?

6:57 PM - Raiden: *how's

6:57 PM - Snusnu: He had been arrested five times for DUI's, keep in mind after like three they yank your license forever

6:57 PM - Raiden: yeah

6:57 PM - Snusnu: so the latter two were on bicycles, etc

6:57 PM - Raiden: I'm 1 point away myself

6:57 PM - Snusnu: but, this isn't entirely about him

6:57 PM - Snusnu: so, I'm Snusnuing one weekend

6:58 PM - Snusnu: and he calls me up

6:58 PM - Snusnu: and he's like

6:58 PM - Snusnu: HEY

6:58 PM - Snusnu: I'VE GOT LIKE SIX GIRLS OVER

6:58 PM - Snusnu: YOU SHOULD COME OVER

6:58 PM - Snusnu: So, after I finish up my gig, I head on over

6:58 PM - Raiden: O_O

6:58 PM - Snusnu: and, true to his word, there's like him and six chicks.

6:58 PM - Raiden: challenge accepted?

6:58 PM - Snusnu: they're all rather blasted, and watching like

6:58 PM - Snusnu: Tales from the Crypt or something

6:58 PM - Snusnu: So, I have a few drinks, catch up a bit

6:59 PM - Snusnu: and I'm making flirty eyes with this redhead

6:59 PM - Snusnu: a few hours later, people are starting to pass out

6:59 PM - Snusnu: so I announce I'm headed home

6:59 PM - Snusnu: the redhead says "It's kind of full up here, can I stay at your place?"

6:59 PM - Snusnu: "Sure"

6:59 PM - Snusnu: so, we go to my place, as I only lived like five minutes away

7:00 PM - Snusnu: she wanted a bit more to drink, but we were out, and the stores were all closed

7:00 PM - Raiden: got her a protein shake?

7:00 PM - Snusnu: luckily, the neighbor downstairs had a habit of making absinthe

7:00 PM - Raiden: ah

7:00 PM - Snusnu: out of cheap, charcol filtered vodka and dubious mail order medicinal herbs.

7:00 PM - Snusnu: So, we have some of this christmas-tree tasting beverage.

7:01 PM - Snusnu: After a few, everything gets a bit hazy, we did our thing and passed out.

7:01 PM - Snusnu: I wake up a few hours later, and I'm thinking

7:01 PM - Snusnu: god damn, I must have left the heat on

7:01 PM - Snusnu: I feel sweat trickling on my back

7:01 PM - Snusnu: so I reach my hand back to wipe it away

7:01 PM - Snusnu: and I realize this girl is uriniating

7:01 PM - Snusnu: all over me

7:01 PM - Snusnu: my bed

7:01 PM - Snusnu: my blanket

7:02 PM - Snusnu: a pillow

7:02 PM - Snusnu: so I leap from bed, pants-naked, with a terrible bellow

7:02 PM - Snusnu: to no effect. She's still urinating, passed out.

7:02 PM - Snusnu: I leap to the shower, and scrub as if I recently escaped from the sewers

7:03 PM - Snusnu: I call my friend and shriek that this harlott just urinated all over me and every worldly possession I had

7:03 PM - Snusnu: He responds with "IT'S OKAY, SHE THREW UP ALL OVER MY SINK"

7:03 PM - Snusnu: I curl up on the couch, terrified by what has transpassed

7:03 PM - Snusnu: I fall asleep.

7:04 PM - Snusnu: I wake up the next morning, bright and early (as is the curse of someone who drank too much)

7:04 PM - Snusnu: and I go to wake her up

7:04 PM - Snusnu: and she's gone.

7:04 PM - Snusnu: just, gone.

7:04 PM - Snusnu: all her stuff is gone.

7:04 PM - Snusnu: It was a piss-and-run.

7:04 PM - Snusnu: We never spoke of it again.

7:04 PM - Raiden: O_O

7:04 PM - Raiden: so wait

7:04 PM - Raiden: she pissed while you were both in bed?

7:05 PM - Snusnu: a near-unending torrential spray.

7:05 PM - Snusnu: while she was sleeping.