The fart have interesting smell under the shower
What did one cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe?
Mitosis
Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.
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I even didn't understand that one, but HAAAHHHHAHAHHHHHHH for solidarity!
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"Sir, we are mining too many useless ores."
Hitler rubs chin and says
"So mine less."
Grammar Nazi burst in
"MINE FEWER!"
Hitler looks up "Yes?"
Hope you get this one. :P
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You stole my joke!
Well, it's not my joke but it's the only good one I know so now I don't have one to tell :(
On the other hand, I own the game anyway. But.. meh D:
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You know what, I'll blacklist him for doing that, and destroy his SG career!
Or just add you too, and let's hope, we can live in peace together until we die :')
Even if you own the game.
At least... you... can.... i don't KNOW!
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Please do that!
No, in all seriousness, it's totally fine. It was just.. of all the jokes he could have picked, he picked the only one I know and the one I would have told if I didn't already have the game. Weird coincidence :)
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Now I'm even glad, he did that, so that's like -1 joke in this topic, I just woke up, and +60 jokes, I bet 80% of them are bad, but still I want to answer all of them, I will get a stroke today probably, so thanks for Ducky :')
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Writing chemistry exam tomorrow so here are your chemistry jokes:
Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK.
The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared
I would like to apologize for not adding more jokes... but maybe I'll update them.... periodically!
Sorry I'll go now :S
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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching an American street performer do some juggling. The juggler notices the four gentleman have a very poor view, so he stands up on a wooden crate and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"
"Yes"
"Oui"
"Sí"
"Ja"
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A guy walks into a bar, orders 12 shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can.
The bartender asks, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"
The guy says, "You would be drinking fast, too, if you had what I had."
The bartender asks, "What do you have?"
The guy says, "75 cents."
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Um, I don't have any jokes, so I'm totally not gonna steal one I received when I did my whitelist thread. I'm instead gonna steal one from NickN5 from a later thead.
In fact, what do you call a blind stag?
No eye deer.
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Stolen jokes are the best, and + for the happy deer!
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This joke isn't stolen, but I'll piggyback off of TreeB's joke. :P
What do you call a blind stag with no legs?
Still no eye deer.
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And when it's a blind stag with no legs having sex?
Still f'n No Eye Deer!
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Oh god I literally love his face
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Well, not a joke but simple gif of how lovely imgur community is ^^
Yes, those are two different posts.
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GOOD JOKE!
But you like a hungarian model, Miss. Palvin, so THIS TIME I let you in!
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i barely read srry here's one
http://www.2dayblog.com/images/2012/january/550x-videogame-monopoly.jpg
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Why does Waldo wear a striped shirt?
Because he doesn't want to be spotted!
=P
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A man walks into the psychiatrist's, covered only in cling film
The psychiatrist says : "I can clearly see your nuts"
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Ah alright, my brain just started to melt after all of this, I have to sleep soon, or I'll die... :'(
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What kind of murderer has moral fiber? – A cereal killer.
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I hope Solid Snake doing prank calls can make you laugh.
If you enjoyed that here's #2.
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That is super, stanley parable.
It does not have to be a good joke, I have the game anyway - and sorry for lower case
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Damn, I had to think about this one, because I use another name on steam for years, but HAH!
Still in, who knows, maybe you'll... lost it until tuesday!
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Where do unreleased farts go? Directly into humans brains! That's how the sh***tty ideas are born. :)
EDIT: ok the first one was bad....I want to repair that :)
The prince is dancing with the princess at the ball.
Suddenly the princess releases unwanted gas.
-I hope it will stay between us. - Said the princess.
-AND I HOPE IT WILL SPREAD AWAY AS FAST AS POSSIBLE! - said the prince.
Sorry for the first one. :)
Have a nice evening. :)
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The second one was bad as well, but don't worry, they're still good... somehow! :D
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Lemme dig into my vast thingy of jokes... Just when you need one you can never think of one >.<
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I own the game, so I have a question for you.
If I flip a coin, what are the chances of getting head?
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What do you get when you pair a black person with an octopus
i dont know. but it quickly gathers cotton.
I hope it was enough to make you laugh. but the other thing is. that i hope that anyone else except me gets this game. because i dont think that i need Stanly so mutch. but it would be fun to play.
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It was! So let's hope, if you'll win, you will fall in love with that game ;o
It's a reallyreally good one btw.
I mean the game.
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So I won a little game just now, and I want to create a giveaway, my fiiiirrrrsssttt whitelist stuff.
And you have to do one simple thing: write a joke into this topic! If i'll laugh, I'll add you to my whitelist.
Just kidding, I'll add everybody even if the joke is a pain in the potato.
And 5 days ago I even didn't know, there is a whitelist thing on this site.
The giveaway is here http://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/mc9Nq/the-stanley-parable
The jokes are there I
\/
Good lllllluck!
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