😈🤣 All aboard the CHEEVO SPAM TRAIN!!! 😵💀

Need to pump up those stats on your Steam profile? Do you embrace an unhindered, uninhibited, unashamed approach to filling your Steam library with utter garbage in order to one-up your friends and enemies alike with false statistical superiority? Well, then look no further, because I bring you this CHEEVO SPAM TRAIN!!!

Yes, the majority of these games are terrible. Seriously, they're freaking terrible games...heck, I think that a couple of them don't even qualify as games. But each title in the list will grant you at least 500 achievements, up to 5,000 for many of them, and often for doing nothing more than just opening the game and then letting your Steam client grind away for a little while.

I know what you're thinking: "geez, Grez, don't you feel a little...dirty for offering this stuff up?" Yes, yes I do. This actually makes me feel like Christina Aguilera (during her rubbed-with-grease-and-wearing @ssless chaps phase) grabbed me by the ears and demanded that I clean her filthy britches with my face. But hey, in my defense, I bought a bunch of stuff on GogoBundle really quickly one night that didn't look that bad...and then like a week later when I actually looked at it more closely, I saw all of these 5K-for-nothing games and was shocked mildly surprised. [note: this purchase may also have involved alcohol.]

But, you know, whatever. I actually played a few of these games...most were horrible, but I'll say that Pain Train 2 is not a total bucket of suck...I beat the whole thing (yep, all 12 levels and all upgrades) one night, which took about 2 hours and was relatively challenging. I mean, it's buggy and frustrating and completely unbalanced (the first two levels are the hardest, and then once you're fully upgraded, you're practically an unstoppable killing machine), but at least it's an actual game and is complete-able. I do like to play/beat the game when possible and feel like I at least halfway earned all of those achievements that dropped.

Hey, I say relax, have a good time with it, and try not to take any of it too seriously. They're just games, after all, and I still feel less ripped off than I did after a couple of really bad Atari cartridge purchases from when I was a kid (Tac-Scan comes to mind). So, sling some points toward the train and you can get some free profile padding, you dirty, dirty bastard. 🤣 ( ͡⊙ ͜ʖ ͡⊙)

🚅Choo-Spammy-Choo🚃🚃🚃🚃

[27 carts, mostly with multiple keys per cart - you must be at least level 1 - good luck]