You play as Winston Gay, a man whose house was taken away by the corrupt government after being called out for wanking too loud by his neighbors. Now, Winston is on a mission to make everyone in the town pay a price for taking away his home.

Wanking Simulator is a mix of destruction & wanking - you are thrown into a town called Gay Bay consisting of a church (God bless), a number of houses and a few other places, such as high school, a garage, etc.
The main goal is to destroy as many things as possible before getting caught by the police and collect points by wanking to the chaos we caused.
You are free to go wherever you want and destroy anything you want.
Our protagonist is given unlockable superpowers, such as making gravity weaker, spawning a rifle in your panties, teleport, etc.

14 June:John D*ck is in the game

https://store.steampowered.com/app/1007840/Wanking_Simulator/

3 weeks ago

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Steam is the greatest store in the world.......

3 weeks ago
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Cheap simulator games like this one are always just 2 minutes of fun before deep feelings of self-loathing and disappointment at actually spending time beating it. On one hand those 2 minutes may certainly be enjoyable, but is it really worth wasting your hard earned money and energy over...? People should get a hold of themselves and STOP. That's what I think.

3 weeks ago*
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Uhm "beating it" is a bit double with this "game" though in which 2 minutes might be enough. :p

Probably will end up free at one point on some site.

3 weeks ago
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+1, People will go blind from playing too much of this

3 weeks ago
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I am laughing so hard at this thread that I am exhausted. I am going to sleep

2 weeks ago
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On one hand those 2 minutes may certainly be enjoyable

Uh. One hand. 2 minutes. Enjoyable.

2 weeks ago
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So it's like actual wanking?!

2 weeks ago
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I buy games like this for a certain friend. I know it's a waste of money but I just can't help myself sometimes.

3 weeks ago
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Deleted

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2 weeks ago
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HAHA! Me, too, but I buy them for like 4 friends then comment stuff like "Why are you all buying this game, I need new friends" etc. Worth the few bucks in just LoLs to myself

2 weeks ago
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2 of my steam friends own it. More questions ?

3 weeks ago
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We reached the actual bottom when random not-even-games stuff showed up, like that "game" with a red screen that only gives free achievements. At least, this Wanking Simulator can be considered a game, albeit a shitty one.

3 weeks ago
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exactly my thoughts when i watched the trailer, it looks like someone put atleast some sort of effort into it :D

3 weeks ago
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Never mind all the terrorism simulators and bigotry-based "games" we already had released in the time period right just Valve admitted they were no longer even pretending to filter content. As I recall, there were ones where you actively shot up schools, ones where you simulated being a Nazi, ones where you abused women "to show them their place", and one had "the gays" sit on broken bottles (in addition to putting them through other problematic situations) because... reasons?

Hell, at least one of those bigotry-based games (albeit a rather less dramatic one) was developed by an active SG member.

By contrast, achievement farms and asset flips and the like were pretty tame issues to deal with.

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3 weeks ago*
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Yeah, a crude joke on Steam is as much of a low as a jaywalking German soldier in Nazi Germany.

3 weeks ago
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If is a joke, i fail to see it.

2 weeks ago
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I don't know of a single person that laughs at every joke ever.

2 weeks ago
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Someone in my friends list wants this thing, I guess there's a public for basically anything.

3 weeks ago
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And Steam's clever algorithm seems to think that this game is in the same category as ...

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3 weeks ago
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To be fair Saints Row the Third allows you to run around naked while hitting people with a giant purple dildo so it isn't really wrong in suggesting that one, like at all.

3 weeks ago
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I mean, in fairness, Wanking Simulator + Crime Scene Cleaner makes sense, and both Saints Row and GTA have pretty crude considerations of sex, so they're not out of place either. As far as Steam associations go, that may be the most reasonable one I've seen thus far. :P

...meanwhile, the same page gives me the following associations:

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3 weeks ago*
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I guess Just Cause is there because of the havoc and destruction and Saints Row for the immature sense of humour related to sex.
But Lego, that's an odd one. Sandbox genre?

3 weeks ago
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Sandbox genre?

Guess it all depends on whether Wanking Simulator's neighborhood features a playground or not.

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3 weeks ago*
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Not as bad as Rape Day, but a shame some developers feel they can only sell games by courting controversy.

3 weeks ago
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The winner for me is the fake pubg someone posted about earlier.

3 weeks ago*
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I actually find this hilarious

Edit: although now that I look at the entire concept, looks like a venting outlet for mentally unstable people

2 weeks ago
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i thought that said walking simulator, i need glasses. good grief.

2 weeks ago
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+1
I was like "Yeah, I suppose those non-games could be considered a lowpoint for some people"
Then I read the OP.

2 weeks ago
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and a tissue

2 weeks ago
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I didn't realize the title says "waNking simulator" until I read your comment. Kept reading it as "waLking simulator". We don't have a dirty mind lol :D

2 weeks ago
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added to wish list.

2 weeks ago
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Same

2 weeks ago
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i know what you getting for xmas

2 weeks ago
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Added to blacklist :D jk

2 weeks ago
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i know what you getting for your Bday

2 weeks ago
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Steam is the pinnacle of PC Gaming and there is absolutely no problem with praising Gaben while they can't even get 2 interns to filter out of the shit. Totally.

2 weeks ago
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Yeah, Steam actually is the best gaming platform in my opinion, but this is a problem :/ Valve would go any lenght to avoid any sort of quality control... yet you want to get rid of "games" like this, some people will bash you for "censoring free speech" or whatever bullshit. Sigh.

2 weeks ago
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I personally really like GOG, though a few things could get better there ( like not requiring 5ish clicks to get from a game in my library to its store page to check reviews) but steam is really not bad. That makes it even worse when favouritism goes too far and let little things slide, that after end of the day shows that Valve doesn't care. (They are trying too hard to be youtube and acting like it's not their business, what people sell on their platform, while still taking a cut)

2 weeks ago
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They are trying too hard to be youtube and acting like it's not their business

I think that's a good point of view. Except, of course, it "kind of" is their business... them running a store and whatnot... :D
But yeah, I'd much rather deal with some layer of quality control and risk potential censorhip than leave shit like this completely unchecked.

Even games that were deemed "incompatible with Greenlight" have no problem getting to Steam now, fuck's sake! >_<

2 weeks ago
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Guiding principle: Never underestimate the capacity of people to reach new, previously unimagined, stages of low.

As a direct consequence: Never underestimate the amount of interest said new lows will generate in others, particularly those who actively seek yet unprecedented levels of lowness.

Conclusion: It can probably go a lot more downhill than it already is... most likely, someone out there is already working on it.

2 weeks ago
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2 weeks ago
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You guys dont like valve exclusives?

2 weeks ago
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Haha :D, spot on!
Sadly this crap is going to be Valve's feature, moar hilarious indie art for a moar varied user experience xD

2 weeks ago
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Valve's features are consumer friendly. The games not so much, you can waste a lot of money on non-games.

2 weeks ago
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lol all the sjw getting offended in this thread

2 weeks ago
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...wait for the kindergarten dlc

2 weeks ago
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They're just mad cause they got caught wanking.

2 weeks ago
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I am not offended, but don't like the garbage that keeps coming to steam either.
There can be a middle road in it.

But why does it have to adress a gay person so much?

2 weeks ago
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I'm surprised Tencent Timmy hasn't already money-hatted it for the Epic Games Store.

It could be the biographical game of his life.

2 weeks ago
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Honestly i prefer One day as Randy Pitchford Simulator
here's an idea for a mechanic, pull a magic trick and mature the contents on your usb drive

2 weeks ago
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And use it as a diversion to funnel 12M royalties-money while having a twitter meltdown.

2 weeks ago
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I hear Randy was dropping usb drives everywhere as he ran through E3 to avoid confrontation

2 weeks ago
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Speaking seriously, I think there being so many games of this vein on the platform is less to do with Valve's inability to be bothered/their supposed "laziness" and more to do with their core libertarian-esque(?) values as a company. Just look at how Valve is run "boss-free" and how employees get to choose what they work on. They do not like governing, imposing rules much of any kind.
And to be honest, I much prefer this way of doing things than what Sony is doing right now for example. These games, as much as I dislike them, don't really clog up the store that much at all in my experience--they're never going to be best sellers, and I doubt they'll pop up from a friend's recommendation, so that leaves them maybe popping up in some searches I make, the "new releases" page or the discovery queue--and I'd much rather them being there, as a rare nuisance, than Valve as a company deciding willy nilly what to censor and remove to best serve their customers interests, and/or set invariably arbitrary guidelines that will almost certainly trip up at some point. Plus, some people obviously like these "games". Some people just find trashyness to be hilarious and entertaining, a cheap laugh, and I don't see why that's necessarily something wrong. You can't have a store full of only games that interest and make sense to you personally, as much as that'd be sweet and make Steam look so much "cleaner".
Steam knows there's problem with so many generally unappealing games cropping up on the platform for people though, and that's why they've done so much work in having it be more intuitive and personalized to your tastes over the last few years (and introduced curators--many of which are specialized towards certain niches and tastes--who you can follow for further suggestions on the storefront). The type of game you most frequently buy and/or play is definitely what you'll see the vast majority of (though I do wonder if this isn't as apparent to us SG users who buy bundles so frequently and/or idle...). And furthermore if you really hate sexual games like this one for example you can actually filter them out completely. Though I do realise most the complaints here are more with the very cheap, asset-flip kinda games. If only there were such a universally applicable tag for those (that wasn't straight up derogatory--since that wouldn't fly well)...

Also, to go on a semi-related tangent here on something else that's been bugging me about this narrative; I think if you truly believe games are an art form--as just about everyone here does I should think--you should be inherently against any kind of censorship, even of the offensive or super crass. Crazy idea I know, but if you really want video games to be legitimized in such a way for the mainstream--as anyone who supports developers and appreciates their work should--you have to accept what seeing it--the medium--as an art form really means. It means accepting that no matter how terrible a work may appear to be to you, that work is still artwork. It's still a contribution with a definitive possibility of creative expression and message, which means it should not be censored no matter how ridiculous its presentation. I realise Steam removing a game from their platform may not necessarily be an exact equivalent to censorship (though with their size and share of the market it is a discussion) but I've seen many large crowds recently call for much more than just Steam removal for these types of offensive games. I've seen such people wanting these games GONE. Like, China and Tienanmen Square gone...

2 weeks ago*
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+1000

2 weeks ago
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You're not wrong, but even art can be objectively shitty.
The problem here is, it's just not working. It's obvious that we've not yet reached the stage where games can go without any sort of quality control.

2 weeks ago
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but even art can be objectively shitty.

I personally don't think it can though. Even if 99.9% of people thought a piece of art was "shitty", that wouldn't/shouldn't make it "objectively" shitty--because the feelings of the majority shouldn't be a basis for objectivity, certainly not in criticising art. It can't be. You can say a piece of art objectively failed at being popular or well received, because you can analyse and prove that with a proper method, but it's quality? There is no objective means to measure that. Everyone will have different opinions because there is no one logical form of analysis on the matter and no wholly unbiased critic. Art is a matter that's inherently subjective and steeped in bias--it's a concept with a different meaning for everyone.

The problem here is, it's just not working. It's obvious that we've not yet reached the stage where games can go without any sort of quality control.

How isn't it working? Steam is as successful as ever as far as I know, and it's working fine for me. Not saying you're wrong, but I think I need you to elaborate a bit more to properly understand what you mean. How have these games broken the platform for you? As for the second part, how do you define that "stage"? Is this "stage" a point in time where all art would be personally agreeable for you...? Because I don't see that being very possible. Or good.
And how exactly do you define "quality"? And how/why do you see that definition of yours as universal? ...And furthermore, why would you want to trust a company to measure that for you?

I'm getting the impression that you don't really see games as an art form. Or at least, aren't prepared to. As weird as it may seem for me to defend a game called "Wanking Simulator" as art, such can be the nature of art. Have you seen much of modern art? Stuff gets weird. But still, people find value to it all--because there's no absolute objectivity here. Just how well things appeal to the majority (which sadly can't be defined as the goal for art).

2 weeks ago*
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how do you define that "stage"

The stage where games could go without any sort of quality control. The stage where every game would be a legit, functioning, competently made product. Pretty much the exact opposite of what we have now. Sure, one could argue that it's subjective, but just look at the amount of shitty non-games on the Steam store and tell me again that quality control isn't needed ;)

I'd much rather have some layer of quality control and risk an occasional "censorship" rather than having to plow through piles of broken, lazily cobbled together garbage. Just sharing my opinion though, not saying that everyone should agree with me (though it'd be nice lol).

2 weeks ago
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having to plow through piles of broken, lazily cobbled together garbage

What are some examples of times you had to do that in the Steam store if you don't mind me asking? Can you recall any specific times you had to "plow through piles of broken garbage" to find something you were after?
Maybe an unfair question on your memory, but I'm a bit incredulous on it really being that much of an issue--an issue I've never once experienced myself. I find these especially "trashy" games usually end up deep down in the store's dark depths, obscure and out the way. Steam usually does a good job in targeting your tastes also (why wouldn't they? They want your money).

The stage where games could go without any sort of quality control. The stage where every game would be a legit, functioning, competently made product.

So a stage where every game comes across as "legit" and "competent" to you? Well damn that seems awfully oppressive and authoritarian... And not very well defined either... You sorta dodged a lot of my questions. For "functioning" I'd agree that you have a solid case--but that has less to do with the actual art and it's measured "quality" and more to do with the inability to even access it. No point in a cinema having a broken movie reel (please pretend cinemas still use those for my analogy, I'm not good with analogies :P).
Though what's to say the game in the OP isn't properly functioning? In fact, I'd say most of the calls for removals or censorship of games have nothing to do with the game not properly functioning, but instead them being "too cheap", offensive, uncomfortable and/or "unacceptably" crass. At least that was mostly what I had in mind when writing my original comment. Steam is usually pretty good with removing completely broken games aren't they?

amount of shitty non-games on the Steam store

What are these "shitty non-games" exactly? (another inherently personal definition from you? I know some people who define FMVs as "non-games", do you?) And Steam does allow for more than just games anyway--software and films namely--so I definitely need more clarity on what these "non-games" are. Those cheap jigsaw puzzles?

2 weeks ago*
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Should have been at E3 truly a masterpiece.

2 weeks ago
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Now he can command you to wank.

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2 weeks ago
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2 weeks ago
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2 weeks ago
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Jerking off on the grave of quality control.

2 weeks ago
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Thank you added to WL

2 weeks ago
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It has John Dick in the game though

2 weeks ago
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Next game to be renamed PLAYERUNKNOWN'S BATTLEGROUNDS in the Steam store?

2 weeks ago
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Metaphor for gamers and the industry?

2 weeks ago
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