A goat, a drum and a snake jump of the cliff.
.
.
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Baaa dum tsss
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(grabs seashell) - moshi moshi, Caligula Desu
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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ngZmGwO2OYw
There are definitely some NSFW jokes by Steven Wright in this video. Best one liners though.
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Hedberg got me through a lot of tough times. Such a shame he's gone.
Two of my all time favourites (even if it's dumb as all sin): "I play sports.... No I don't, what the fuck?" and "I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to too!"
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Same. It's a shame. He was an inspiration. He had horrible stage freight to the point where his hands would visibly shake during shows... My favorite joke of his was actually during his appearance on that 70's show.
https://youtu.be/M8NZqD_pJT8
Haha. XD His delivery is really what made them hilarious. He knew comedy.
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Not really a quote, just the first 2 lines of a Terry Pratchett short story:
"It was a fine summer morning, the kind to make a man happy to be alive. And probably the man would have been happier to be alive. He was, in fact, dead. It would be hard to be deader without special training."
http://www.us.lspace.org/books/toc/toc-english.html
If you´ve never read Pratchett you definitely should, he´s really funny. You should start with The colour of magic.
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Terry Pratchett is one of my favorite authors. I also enjoy Robert Aspirin. )
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Never heard of that other guy before but from what I just googled it looks like I might enjoy it, so I´ll definitely check him out. I assume that if you like Terry you´ve read Douglas Adams.
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for every day, also NSFW.
“Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.”
George Carlin
edit: i had to google blankets with sleeves, so lost some effect. but, as you said, humor is pretty subjective and editing this just to say that, recently, found the very right humor for me.
add that the guy made me laugh here, @SG, and talking about sg things. you could also add that he's from Support, but guess might be irrelevant (or maybe not).
fact is, he reminded me about the lightness you have to have participating in a community like ours.
one of the most memorable remainders ever had, steamgifts meme train driver!
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I was at a wedding shower and they announced that they we opening the line to the punch bowl for drinks.
I quickly made my way to the line and twirled around to the person behind me and said...
“Ha ha! I beat ya to the punch!”
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Expected that you were the only person wanting drinks, so there was no punch line :D
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"The problem about getting quotes from internet is that you never know if they are true" (Abraham Lincoln)
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Made me start my morning with a smile even before a pot of coffee.
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found a copy of il colore della magia so, was kinda happy. i'll start with that.
also, as we're here, how far you'd say Douglas Adams is from Pratchett?
Dadams is like... bread that feeds mind and soul, here.
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Adams and Pratchett have the same dry, cynical, tongue-in-cheek humor, but Prachett is even more eloquent. Also, Pratchett is known for his Discworld series, which is Fantasy.
“Look, sir, I know Angua. She's not the useless type. She doesn't stand there and scream helplessly. She makes other people do that.” -- [Excerpt from Jingo, a Discworld novel.]
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:o
just got a new problem, here.
.. .
oh, thank you, by the way
:D
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Wax on... Wax off, wax on... wax off
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We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
you should spot the author from miles away.
also, i think cg is helping a bunch of us just to get that.
so, kinda TGIM!
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I don't get people who stumble into mirrors. They need to watch themselves.
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:D
this was my espresso, thank you, now i feel so ready!
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thought the term was "mind loop", and seems not:
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=mind%20loop
the right one should be "thought loop":
A thought loop can be described as the experience of becoming trapped within a chain of thoughts, actions and emotions which repeats itself over and over again in a cyclic loop
cause really don't need to be "high" to experience them. btw, just noticed that this definition is by PsychonautWiki...
anyway, i fear them :o ...maybe another coffee is needed, here and now
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"Oh, Bwoonhilda, you're so wovely."
"Yes, I know it, I can't help it."
Rabbit of Seville is better but not really quotable"
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In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.
Terry Pratchett
(a special one for IAmNew and his kis, big big kis)
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beware, this is a video quote. still for the Day.
What Matters | Adult Swim
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdPIHjXcckc
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I just caught this one on the Internet.
Have you recently read (or heard of) any "one-liners" that made you laugh out loud? Everyone's sense of humor is a bit different, so the only requirement is that it be something that actually made you laugh. Remember to use the spoiler tag and "NSFW" warning if applicable.
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