Have you ever been bullied or didn't react when seeing other people getting bullied?
I've been bullied in school. At the end of the school i got back to them big time. My character got stronger with some points in stamina, strenght, agility and intelligence. Long story short ... welcome to the jungle ... where only the mighty survive :)
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Hmmm, is that Fallout? ;P Well, I hope you didn't do anything bad, but still, I'm glad you stood against them. :) You see people, everything can be fixed. :)
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Well, they were stupid. Would they like it if they were in a foreign country and everyone would mock them? -_- And it's awesome that your friend was there for you. And you should always be there for him/her too. Each nice to have each other's back. :)
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I'm just gonna leave this here.
Bullying is not just about using brute force / physicall assaults. I think that even more often it's about abusing someone mentally, every day, every week. Maybe for everyone around it's super funny to call someone names, making fun about everything you do, constantly remind your past mistakes, constantly withstand you to "others" by saying that you're not normal because you don't drink / smoke / pick some other thing.
And worst thing from all this is that you know, that even if you gather remains of your strenght and go to the teacher / parent / whatever, they will just say "why can't you be like others?"/ "they are just boys, don't mind them" / "you just can't laught of yourself" / "have more self-confidence" and other useless stuff.
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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. ;) Also, once you've taken a few punches and realize you're not made of glass, you don't feel alive unless you're pushing yourself as far as you can go (ok, that's a movie quote xD ). Great video. And a bit sad too. :/ And I know, there are a lot of kinds of bullying. But there's a solution to every problem. There are always people that will help you. You can even ask for professional advice. But the one thing you should never do is to give up. If you react, especially when in an early phase, you will probably succeed.
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Nope there aren't people who will help you. It doesn't matter if they do it in change room after PE or in front of your teacher. They just legitimize bullying as something normal, because they don't want to deal with it. I never met a teacher that'd stand in defence of bullied person.
And trying to stand up for yourself? Lol, I wouldn't want 15 people to mock me even more than they used to. Maybe it's a solution when there is one person who occassionaly mock you. But not when whole class is against you just because they think that that you're easy target.
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There are people that care. Just because you haven't met them, it doesn't mean that they don't exist. -_-
Also, you're considered an easy target if you're not standing up for yourself. If you stand against the bullies, you're not considered an easy target anymore.
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I was never a bully to someone just because they are different. In fact, I'm the one who's being bullied way too much at school, because they think I'm being stupid, acting stupid, being different, etc. which is because of asperger's syndrome (at least I'm 99% sure of it, I'm not diagnosed for multiple reasons). It has been lasting for multiple years now. I cannot react on it because they just team up on me, and I have not a single idea what to say to them. I can't ask for true help on anyone, except emotional help which I only get from 1 person. Once I even wanted to commit suicide because of it, but I somehow managed to not do that because I found my gf on the internet. But even with her it was real hard to get over it, I actually don't think I'll ever get over it properly. This is my final year at my current school though, but who knows what's next, it may even get worse. Not having a single actual friend doesn't help either. I don't think there are many bullies on SG though, because most people I've seen (excluding some scammers of course) are pretty nice. Also that song you've got there is good.
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Bullies on sg will get the banhammer. ;P Don't think like that. Think more positive. Next year, everything will get better. If there are bullies there too, try to react as fast as you can. Show them you aren't someone to "fuck" with. Try helping people that are getting bullied and they will most probably take a stand with you against bullies. You can ask for professional help too in the phone number I typed above. And yep, it's an awesome song. It brought me feelings. :'(
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It's nice that you took a stand against the bully. Never let anyone bully you again. ;)
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The dropout rate is only 7%, so there can't be 1 in 10 students dropping due to bullying. https://nces.ed.gov/fastfacts/display.asp?id=16
Also, many of your stats have important undefined terms.
I think kids who are skipping school because they are bullied need to be paid attention to and helped. But I think you tackle this by helping the kids who are having trouble, not by opposing "bullying" itself.
Cheers.
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I got it from a site. I wrote the source in the description. Maybe they're outdated?
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A site with a title like stopbullying.org is an advocacy site, and all info they publish will be construed to be furthering their cause. Such claims always have to be checked. That's just how it is.
You can support the cause if you want, but if you want actual data, you'll have to look elsewhere.
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Hmm, that was the most legit data I couldn't find. Sorry then. They're probably outdated or not well calculated. :/
EDIT: I was talking about the site www.dosomething.org , not the other one below.
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OK. Maybe I'm blind. I'm not seeing a link to dosomething, only to stopbullying.
EDIT: now I see it. Not a link, which is why I missed it.
However, same critique goes for that site. Advocacy sites are just not good places to get good data.
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Well, they're doing researches like every day. And the results are always different. Maybe they did a research in small areas or something. :/
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They are not doing their own researching. They are getting it from other sources. It is always worth following the data.
For example, on the 1 in 10 claim, here is dosomething's source: Bullying-Implications%20from%20UCEA%20July2012. And in fact the statement from the research is, "One out of every 10 students drops out or changes schools due to repeated bullying."
Although both are serious, there is a significant difference between dropping out and switching schools.
Also, this data came from before 2011, and the dropout rate has fallen significantly since then. So, yes, this data is also outdated.
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Well, at least, you stopped being a bully. And it's nice that you stopped being bullied. Be nice to the others and they will be nice to you too. Keep strong. ;)
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Bump! I was bullied once when i was around 10. Fortunately it never happened again. Bullies were rare at my hometown.
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I hope they will stop existing. ;P It's nice that you aren't getting bullied anymore. And thanks for the bump. :)
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Whoever says they never bullied someone is pretty much straight out lying. We've all been bullied at some point in ours lifes (even if for a short period of time) and we all bullied someone in our lifes at one point or another.
I always thought it to be quite fascinating why people love putting everything into black and white. Not all bullies are inherently bad people and not all those who get bullied are innocent victims. Don't get me wrong, I am absolutely against bullying, especially if someone gets seriously hurt as a result of it, but I also think that nowadays people tend to overreact. Kids and teenagers and yes even adults, love to banter and talk shit to each other, that's life. At one point in your life you have to learn to deal with it.
Teach kids to handle such situations on their own, but parents/teachers/whoever should keep an eye on it of course and intervene if it gets out of hand.
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True, true, Jekaterina. We've all been bullied, even if we don't even remember it. And we've probably all bullied someone, even if we just thought it was an innocent joke. Some people need guidance though to understand the difference between right and wrong. People that can't react to bullies also need guidance.
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I just think people nowadays get offended way too easily. Especially the younger generation is brought up to believe crying and yelling how offended or hurt you are will be enough to make all kinds of problems vanish suddenly. And that's bad.
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In my opinion its all about help from outsiders that see that "bullying" i know that in US its big problem . I never was bullied myself but seen some of this crap .When i was in school i never tolerated this kind of stuff if somebody harrassed weaker person... Moslty I end fighting with person who bullied weaker person maybe because of my temper i know that is not perfect way to stop that problem but im just simple guy who dont tolerate things like that and i act with fists.In my opinion outsiders need to step out stop watching and act say something not with fists since as i said i know thats not the best way...Say something maybe this fu*** who bullying will stop if this will not help you need step a little further and use stronger arguments. People cant watch and do nothing when somebody need our help even if this requires use of our fists.
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True. And when you support other people, they will support you too in the time of need. When people stick together, even if bullies can hit 1 or 2 weaker kids, they won't be able to stop a whole group of bullied kids.
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You are never going to stop bullying and that is why it has gotten so out of control instead of finding ways to deal with it and prepare people for it we want to try and fix it by making these ads about others standing up and saying something and so on.There are reason people ignore it and let it go on and these ads are not going to do much to change that when in the end the bully still has most of the power no matter how many say something.As you can do little to actually defend yourself form it
See a bully works on fear and manipulation and yes sometimes it can go a bit further with violence but for the most part it just works on fear and manipulation of the victim.They give all the power to the bully because now you can do little to defend yourself without fear of also being punished..You can report it but forget about defending yourself unless you are being physically attacked.
You use to be able to push back some or if they got into your face you could show them they are to close by telling them back off and that still was not enough you could push them away.If that still did not do the trick you could give them another warning and usually if that did not do it a swift punch in the face usually did the trick.Now if you do that you risk suspension,arrest and other punishments for protecting yourself from someone who just will not leave you alone.You could also of course just ignore them which i find worked pretty well for me,as the whole point of being a bully is getting that reaction out of you and if they can not they move on to someone who will.
I do like how they are trying to get other students involved to do something but really it did not work then and it will not work now.You have to remember getting involved takes a lot as now you will become a target and a lot of the times you will get it worse then the kid that you trying to help.If you say something to someone then people treat you as a snitch and so on.We need to give back the power for people to defend themselves and not be in fear of being in trouble for standing up for themselves.Instead we have become a society that hides behind a false sense that his can some how go away with ads and education without more bullying or violence.This imo has got to this point because of givng the bullies all the power and making the victim feel like they can do little to defend themselves without fear of trouble or punishment.Truth is sometimes that what it takes sometimes you have to push back or show a bit a violence with a well placed punch to the nose.
Gone are the days of things being settled on the playground so to speak unless you are willing to risk being in just as much trouble if not more then the bullies just for defending yourself.You take away the power to defend yourself and you give all the power to the bullies as they know you can do little to defend yourself and your a lot less likely to say anything about it and even if you do they will just get worse with little punishment to the bully but far more problems later for the victim who a lot of the times ends up becoming one of them or more violent because they where powerless to defend against it and it bottles up and turns into hate and rage.
I took care of a few bullies when i was in school with a good ol ass kicking and told them if they mess with anyone else i would be back again and with more people.You will never stop it all but giving some power back to the victim would keep it from being what it is now.
All this is imo and from my life experience from dealing with it when i was in school and how i did.Maybe i am foolish in my thinking but i still feel strongly of giving back the power to defend yourself more freely would balance things out a bit more.As most bullies do it themselves because they are afraid and use it to act out to get the attention and maybe vent anger.
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To conclude, what do you suggest? To defend yourself and attack back, right? You're right, but that depends. Every occasion is different. Some bullies will stop if their parents find out, some bullies will stop if the teachers will punish them, some bullies will stop with a few punches, some bullies will stop just by talking to them, etc. ;)
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And that is why i said sometimes you need to push back,and other times just ignoring them will work or other methods.Still sometimes you need to defend yourself when it is past words and should not be the only source to resolve it.
But as it stands now the only way to do is,is to ignore them and hope they go away or tell someone and in most cases now a days that does little because they know not much will be done.Most bullies do it for deeper reason then just because.The ones that back down easy are the ones that either doing it to try fit in or testing the waters to see how it may feel to be the bully instead getting bullied.
Sometimes someone just needs a good butt kicking to see the error of there ways and even sometimes that will not work.I thought i made that clear with my post that violence is a last resort and not all violence has to be looked at as evil other wise evil will prevail.
I am not talking about beating them till they are bloody,but sometimes a punch or two in the right place may sway the bully to leave people a lone if all else fails or just getting in there face and pushing them back is enough but still shoving is still a form of violence.
In the end there is no perfect solution there never will be.But this whole thing of thinking by just getting others to step up is going to some how fix most of it when most of the power is with the bullies it just not going to work anymore then the war on drugs ever was going to matter.
If you want to stop a problem the best way to do is to make the punishment harsh enough that they will think twice about doing it again,but as long as it is a slap on the wrist or a speech of do not do it again they will take little away from what they are doing is wrong.Again that will not stop it all but you never will the point is to do things to control it and get most of it taken care of.
I mean imagine what life would be like if there was no punishment at for killing someone,Sure people are still killed with harsh punishment but if there was none there would be a lot more of it.
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You're right. Everyone deserves a second chance, but they still must understand what they did was wrong. And what's a better way to do this other than punishing them! A punishment and a re-education will make them walk the right way.
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It was rather rare to see bullies when I was in school (since it was a small school).
I've only had one true face to face experience with a bully. On New Years Eve at a party, my younger sister was being harassed by this one girl who was full of herself (she thought she was tough and no one could stop her). She had this big hockey stick in her hands and after being a massively annoying, she thought it would be even funnier to use it to scoop snow, hit my sister and me, with it. I guess she must of thought I was unable to anything possibly because I was smaller than she was. But I just snapped. I still remember the horror on her face when I walked right up and ripped the stick from her hands, threw it to the ground and then gabbed her by the back of the head and made her face plant the ground. She started to balled her eye's out and we left. I don't feel good about what I did, but when it comes right down to it, sometimes people like her just need a taste of their own medicine.
As I've gotten older I've found I'm no longer afraid to step in/say something. And I've noticed one of the biggest issue is those who sit by and do nothing. It's rather bother some when you see a video of someone being harassed/assaulted and no one does a thing or some just grab their phones a film :( Seriously wtf people? DO SOMETHING!
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I would surely do the same to protect my sister too. Still, I'm a man, so I can't hit a woman of course. XD Anyway, it's all about reacting, people. And react fast. ;)
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This is one thing that bothers me too, as a women, I think it shouldn't matter what my gender is. If I'm an asshole, I'm still an asshole and it should make no difference on who gives me a wake up call. I mean why should it be "okay" if I hit you, but not the other way around? (I'm not saying it's okay to hit someone, just saying some "unwritten rules" are stupid).
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I understand what you say and you are correct. Still, if the people around would see me hit a woman, who do you think they would support? Me or the woman? ;) Anyway, men aren't supposed to hit women, because women are usually weaker in terms of strength. I'm not saying of course that some women don't deserve a slap because they're bitches, but what I'm saying is that it seems more fair if I would hit another man. But anyway, violence isn't the answer. Violence begets more violence.
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I actually ponder this a lot and I always come to the same conclusion : Humans are cruel and horrible by nature, be it emotions or not, and hotbullet8 gives a good description of how natural it can come by : Dad gets shit on by horrible boss at work, goes home and releases stress/frustrations by yelling at kids (and possibly drinks because stereotypes), kids take their own frustrations / stress out on those smaller than themselves. It's a vicious cycle, bullying is, but bullying at its core is human nature. I myself, despite thinking I have decent control over my emotions, snap at people once in a while. It's hard not to.
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True. The more I learn about people, the more I like animals. If you bully, because you were bullied, you're just another cog in the bully machine, a machine which you help to keep it running. If some people would stop bullying and stand against bullies, the machine would eventually break. :/
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Wow, I envy you then. You got the best out of a tough situation. Bravo, bravo. ^_^
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Iam lucky? I never got experience with bullying in school. Depend maybe on your first days in new school, it give u any "mark" u can seems like nerd or smth... But u always must seems like "try once bully me and i break your hand". But idk i never was in contact with real bully. Only some shitty things like one punch, pepper spray... Word things doesnt count.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5EofwRzit0 ;P
We've all been bullied. Maybe it was something that seemed unimportant to us, but it's still considered bullying. But yeah, I'm also a bit like that, threatening whoever tries to shit with me. :P
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I am. There's a difference to threats and violence. :P I like swearing, mostly in a friendly way, but if other people are trying to make a fool of me, I must react, right? So, if needed, I may threaten them and this seems to be enough, without resorting to any violence. ;)
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Meehh, assholes exist in every country. It's about lack of education and common sense. ;P
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I know someone who used to be a bully and now is a kindest person (if I'm not mistaken he even joined seminary).
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Bravo to him/her. That's why everyone deserves a second chance, in order to prove that he/she can find the right way. ;)
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Yeah. You can never know the circumstances. Some have abusive parents or were neglected etc.
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Bump, this thread needs to be seen.
Bullying is not okay.
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Look at college campuses here in the States. They're filled with fragile, sensitive punks who whine for "safe spaces" and banning all sorts of things they don't like. They should've been bullied more when they were young. Either it would have toughened them up, or those weirdos would've learned to stay out of sight.
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What are you talking about? Why would you like seeing people getting bullied?
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Exactly. Most of them, at least the ones that don't change their attitude, end up being a complete nothing.
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an awesome experience was my elementary school reunion, when we were all in our twenties.
The stupid kid who had failed first grade was a professional athlete
The bookworm girl had earned her PhD from Oxford (and is now super rich)
The homely girl was now drop-dead gorgeous
The guy who didn't fit in (but wasn't an outcast) had just come back from living in foreign country X, and was about to move to foreign country Y - for no real reason
etc. etc.
Everyone just turned out the way you kinda hoped they would
(of course, the kid I taught how to use a computer is now retired, after founding and selling 2 software/tech companies)
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Hey, hey, hey! :D How are you, people? I hope you're all fine. Even if you aren't fine, things can and will get better.
Today, we're going to talk about bullying. Bullying is a serious problem. We've all been bullied at some point in our life and maybe it didn't even affect us or it had a very small duration or we don't even remember it, but still, we've all been bullied. And we've also seen many people getting bullied, but did we react? Did we protect the victim from being bullied? I was never a bully and I always hated bullies, but I've seen a lot of people getting bullied in the school, in the university, in the navy, and in some jobs, and even though sometimes I tried to protect them, some other times I didn't even react. And you know, this makes me really angry......with myself. So, to stop my compunction, I would like to talk about this "plague" widely known as bullying.
Here are some facts about bullying (about American students only - sorry, I couldn't find any worldwide facts):
1) Over 3,2 million students are victims of bullying each year.
2) Approximately 160000 teens skip school every day because of bullying.
3) 17% of American students report being bullied 2 to 3 times a month or more within a school semester.
4) 1 in 4 teachers see nothing wrong with bullying and will only intervene 4% of the time.
5) By age 14, less than 30% of boys and 40% of girls will talk to their peers about bullying.
6) Over 67% of students believe that schools respond poorly to bullying, with a high percentage of students believing that adult help is infrequent and ineffective.
7) 71% of students report incidents of bullying as a problem at their school.
8) 90% of 4th through 8th graders report being victims of bullying.
9) 1 in 10 students drop out of school because of repeated bullying.
10) As boys age, they are less and less likely to feel sympathy for victims of bullying. In fact, they are more likely to add to the problem than solve it.
11) Physical bullying increases in elementary school, peaks in middle school, and declines in high school. Verbal abuse, on the other hand, remains constant.
Feeling Down? Talk to a trained crisis counselor. Text “DS” TO 741-741. Free, 24/7, Confidential. (source: www.dosomething.org)
Also, check out: http://www.stopbullying.gov/
You're not alone, guys and girls. Have you seen all those percentages above? Bullied people are a lot more than the bullies, so you can make a group and take a stand.
You're getting bullied? Then react. Bullies will usually keep bullying people that never react to their bullying . You're afraid to react? Then ask for help. There are a lot of people that would gladly help you. Myself included.
You're seeing other people getting bullied? Protect them and that will make you a real hero in the eyes of the people around you. Protect other people and then other people will also protect you. If you don't protect them, then who will protect you if the bullies will come for you?
And here's a very powerful song about bullying: Rise Against - Make It Stop (September's Children). It's mostly about the LGBT community, but you know, it's still against bullying in general. 5 young people (Tyler Clementi, age 18 - Billy Lucas, age 15 - Harrison Chase Brown, age 15 - Cody J. Barker, age 17 - Seth Walsh, age 13), as read aloud during the song, were driven to suicide because bullies were mocking them because they were different. It's awesome being different. Don't let some stupid bullies, that will probably end up doing NOTHING in their life, tell you what you are. YOU choose what you are. Do NOT choose to let them break you. Be PROUD of what you are.
Here's a group, if you ever want to talk about being bullied or support people that are getting bullied. I can make you an admin too, if you want to.
And here's a giveaway for you. Keep strong! Peace! ;)
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